||||||||| Catherwood re-enters the Waiting Room and explains "This is the main discussion room which is logged each night." ||||||||| Catherwood announces, "The time is 4:32 AM - I now declare Thursday's chat log for April 23, 2026 officially open!"... and then, he retires back to the vestibule... ||||||||| Catherwood strides in with a trumpet, plays a fanfare, and proclaims "Nine PM on Thursday, April 23, 2026 - I now declare alt.comedy.firesgn-thtre's chat officially open!" -- then he looks around at the empty room, looks at his watch, and mumbles "...am I early?" ||||||||| Catherwood leads Deputy Dang into the room, accepts a grimy quarter as a gratuity, grumbles something about 8:00 PM, then departs. ||||||||| It's 10:30 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| Deputy Dang - dead from Globner's disease ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... ||||||||| Catherwood trudges in at 8:00 PM, dragging Deputy Dang by one foot and asks "Can anyone vouch for this yahoo?" ||||||||| Catherwood tiptoes into the room, and snorts derisively "Announcing 'Cease', also known as 'Nancy' -- the time is 8:00 PM" -- then he slowly retires back into the vestibule... ||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 11 O'CLOCK", then silently exits. Cease: No, guess not. ||||||||| It's 11:15 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| Cease - dead from the fiddlers ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... ||||||||| It's 11:30 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| Deputy Dang - dead from jaundice ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... ||||||||| Catherwood strides up and pipes up "Presenting 'llanwydd', just granted probation at 8:00 PM", then leaves hurriedly. llanwydd: hows everybody ||||||||| It's 12:30 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| llanwydd - dead from Globner's disease ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... ||||||||| Catherwood enters, and announces to all and sundry "It's 4:31 AM, time to change the log file and clean out unused rooms; please exit the chat room for a minute or two. Thank you for your patience."
