Weekly Firesign Chat Cheese Log

A Firesign Chat
05/23/2013

Archive

Special appearance by
Phil Austin as 'Paustin'
Phil Austin as 'Poaustin'

||||||||| Catherwood re-enters the Waiting Room and explains "This is the main discussion room which is logged each night."
||||||||| Catherwood announces, "The time is 4:33 AM - I now declare Thursday's chat log for May 23, 2013 officially open!"... and then, he retires back to the vestibule...
||||||||| Catherwood enters with DJTween close behind, grumbles something about disrupting his 8:26 PM tree-stunting plans, and runs off to the anteroom.
||||||||| New notice: '** There will be a Firesign Theatre/US Plus Stimulcast starting at 8pm CST this evening, with music beginning at 7:45pm CST. Listen to the stream at 128k at http://listen.ehhh.us:8000/tweeny.m3u or at 16k for dial-up users at http://listen.ehhh.us:8000/tweeny16k.m3u (streaming server graciously provided by Radio Free Dishnuts - www.dishnuts.net)'
||||||||| Catherwood stumbles in at 8:43 PM, dragging Rufus_T_Firetween by one foot and asks "Can anyone vouch for this Firehead?"
||||||||| Catherwood walks up and announces "Presenting 'Klara', just granted probation at 8:43 PM", then leaves hurriedly.
||||||||| Catherwood tiptoes into the room, and intones "Announcing 'garyh', also known as 'Nancy' -- the time is 8:44 PM" -- then he slowly retires back into the Aviary...
||||||||| New notice: '** currently playing - Warm Up Music- listen to the stream at 128k at http://listen.ehhh.us:8000/tweeny.m3u or at 16k for dial-up users at http://listen.ehhh.us:8000/tweeny16k.m3u (streaming server graciously provided by Radio Free Dishnuts - www.dishnuts.net)'
||||||||| Catherwood escorts hmmm clem in through the front door at 8:44 PM, picks up his cues (only slightly scorched), and heads for the billiard room.
Klara: hello
||||||||| A time machine materializes at 8:45 PM and Sojourner steps out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece.
||||||||| "8:46 PM? 8:46 PM!!" says Catherwood, "shoes for the dead should be here by now...oh, THERE you are!" as shoes for the dead enters and sits on the divan.
shoes for the dead: evenin
||||||||| Gernica steps in at 8:47 PM carrying an obsidian door knocker.
hmmm clem: hello klara
||||||||| A W Smith tiptoes in around 8:47 PM, trying to avoid Catherwood because of last year's "unpleasant incident."
||||||||| Catherwood stumbles in at 8:47 PM, dragging Mad Mike by one leg and asks "Can anyone vouch for this idiot?"
DJTween: Evenin' all
Mad Mike: I have probably listening to FST since before the beginning
hmmm clem: please sit
DJTween: You'll be in good company here
DJTween: several folks who have known them from their inception
||||||||| "8:49 PM? 8:49 PM!!" says Catherwood, "kpnanny should be here by now...oh, THERE you are!" as kpnanny enters and sits in front of the fireplace.
||||||||| Outside, the 8:49 PM downtown bus from Indiana pulls away, leaving MKBorders coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes.
||||||||| Sojourner departs at 8:49 PM, singing "Toad away, toad away; toad away, toad away! Where do you go when you're toad away?"
Mad Mike: My mom was a bozoette in high school....but I lost my nose when stationed overseas
DJTween: a sad tale...
Klara: there are many sad tails of the sea, I assure you
Mad Mike: Will Deputy Dan be here?
shoes for the dead: not his tail, his nose!
||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood announces: "8:52 PM and late as usual, it's Dexter Fong, just back from Elmertown."
Klara: I nose that, I was making a pun
shoes for the dead: who knows?
||||||||| Catherwood tiptoes into the room, and announces "Announcing 'UniversalistRev', also known as 'Nancy' -- the time is 8:53 PM" -- then he slowly retires back into the Aviary...
DJTween: Hey Dex
||||||||| At 8:54 PM, MKBorders vanishes mysteriously -- just as Nino the Mind Boggler predicted!
Klara: is the crowd usually large here?
||||||||| MKBorders enters at 8:54 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and dashes off to the Chapeau Manger.
kpnanny: I'm bettin everyone here is small...
||||||||| It's 8:55 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| garyh - dead from jaundice
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Klara: not if they're american haha
Dexter Fong: Catherwood, please serve me my regular Boinklin and hold Ethyl
||||||||| Catherwood hands Dexter Fong my regular boinklin and hold ethyl.
Dexter Fong: Hiya Tweeny
||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood intones: "8:55 PM and late as usual, it's Ratdog, just back from Elmertown."
Klara: Catherwood, please serve me a large glass of virgin blood
||||||||| Catherwood gives Klara a large glass of virgin blood.
MKBorders: Evening room. My very first Fst chat
Klara: delectable
DJTween: Hi MKB, and welcome :)
Klara: this is also my first chat
shoes for the dead: pull up a chair and sit on your stool
Klara: brb
DJTween: Hi Klara :)
kpnanny: seeral chat virgins here and no, Klara cannot have my blood...yet
kpnanny: several
||||||||| Catherwood ushers Pat Hat in through the front door at 8:57 PM, picks up his cues (only slightly scorched), and heads for the billiard room.
DJTween: Hello Mr. Hat
Pat Hat: good evening
||||||||| A time machine materializes at 8:58 PM and Jules sashays out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece.
||||||||| 8:59 PM: Bob Rapid jumps out of the hall closet saying "I've been listening to all of you talking about me for the past hour!"
||||||||| "8:59 PM? I'm late!" exclaims Jules, who then runs out through the french doors and down through the flowerbeds.
Klara: out of the closet! that's a big step
||||||||| Catherwood accompanies CS into the room, accepts an I.O.U. as a gratuity, grumbles something about 8:59 PM, then departs.
Dexter Fong: Guess Jules didn't like the grape
Dexter Fong: Hi Cat
CS: Hi gang
||||||||| Outside, the 8:59 PM crosstown bus from Funfun Town pulls away, leaving George Leroy coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes.
||||||||| Catherwood strides in with a trumpet, plays a fanfare, and proclaims "Nine PM on Thursday, May 23, 2013 - I now declare alt.comedy.firesgn-thtre's chat officially open!"
Bob Rapid: lot of money ... lot of airports...
||||||||| Outside, the 9:00 PM crosstown bus from Funfun Town pulls away, leaving Yucaipa Heat coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes.
||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood snorts derisively: "9:00 PM and late as usual, it's Harpster, just back from Boise."
||||||||| Happy Harry Cox enters at 9:00 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and hurries off to the Chapeau Manger.
||||||||| 9:00 PM: Uh-clem jumps out of the hall closet saying "I've been listening to all of you talking about me for the past year and a half!"
||||||||| thefast1 enters at 9:00 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and rushes off to the Chapeau Manger.
shoes for the dead: happy Victoria day plus a few, Cat
CS: Shoes for the dead was a little flick I made in Japan in 07
DJTween: Hi cease
CS: thanks shoes
||||||||| Catherwood steals into the room, and snorts derisively "Announcing 'Rubber Shoes', also known as 'Nancy' -- the time is 9:01 PM" -- then he slowly retires back into the anteroom...
CS: in the summer they have a festival for the dead called Obon
||||||||| Catherwood accompanies Garo inside, makes a note of the time (9:01 PM), then fades off into the distance going on about the waiting room or the sitting room or something.
CS: people dance around to welcome the dead back to their home towns
Happy Harry Cox: Shoes For Indusrty
CS: this sounds familiar. what is this from, tween?
shoes for the dead: do they dance barefoot?
CS: ah, the tween voice
CS: no they wear sandals, very japanese sandals
||||||||| Outside, the 9:03 PM uptown bus from Elmertown pulls away, leaving leroy coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes.
||||||||| Catherwood escorts Beet in through the front door at 9:03 PM, picks up his cues (only slightly scorched), and heads for the billiard room.
Beet: Hello, gang
shoes for the dead: the movie of this album is Great!!
George Leroy: 'coughing'
Dexter Fong: Hi Beet
CS: http://moniqueishikawa.com/nihongo/index.htm
Beet: This is one of my very faves
||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood intones: "9:05 PM and late as usual, it's Hawkmoth, just back from Funfun Town."
Dexter Fong: Hi LAURA
CS: I brought a pair of my daughter's shoes back to the Japanese town where she grew up and had them dance around, puppet-like
MKBorders: Still have my copy of the movie
||||||||| At 9:06 PM, Harpster scurries out the door saying "Hey, mister ice-cream man, I've got a nickel, wait for meeeee..."
||||||||| 9:06 PM: Harpster jumps out of the hall closet saying "I've been listening to all of you talking about me for the past hour!"
CS: by the way Tween, re Neal Amid, the second word is pronounced a MID
George Leroy: All I know is everything you know is wrong
Beet: Funny Names Club
CS: i thought i had the flick but then realized i'd seen it at Elayne's, never had a copy
||||||||| yojimbo enters at 9:07 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and dashes off to the Haberdashery Barn.
Hawkmoth: has a copy of the album.
Beet: Art Holdflatter
MKBorders: and I still believ that pigs live in trees and faithful rover is just dog sitting by the doggie door.
CS: not one of kurosawa's better flicks, but welcome anyway, yojimbo
||||||||| Catherwood escorts Papoon inside, makes a note of the time (9:08 PM), then fades off into the distance going on about the waiting room or the sitting room or something.
Hawkmoth: his ancestors came from the dog star millions of years ago, and you probably don't even know who your father is. X-)
||||||||| New notice: '** currently playing - EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS WRONG - listen to the stream at 128k at http://listen.ehhh.us:8000/tweeny.m3u or at 16k for dial-up users at http://listen.ehhh.us:8000/tweeny16k.m3u - this album can be purchased at: http://laughstore.stores.yahoo.net/firtheatseze.html'
Beet: Yes, that's right
Harpster: spuds for industry....from Idaho~!
||||||||| A time machine materializes at 9:09 PM and Merlyn steps out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece.
DJTween: Hi Merl
Dexter Fong: Hi Merlyn
George Leroy: proof
Beet: I was right about the comet
CS: spuds for Idaho would be redundant
Happy Harry Cox: Emmris!
Hawkmoth: No crazed sterno bum.
Merlyn: hey DJ DF
||||||||| It's 9:10 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Ratdog - dead from Globner's disease
||||||||| hmmm clem - dead from The Plague
||||||||| A W Smith - dead from intense demonic possession
||||||||| UniversalistRev - dead from intense demonic possession
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Rufus_T_Firetween: EYKIW at Firesign Media - https://firesigntheatrelegacy.com/media/media.php?item=eykiw
CS: hey merl, did you see Austin talking to Packer on facebook today?
George Leroy: I swear to hell I saw it!
||||||||| Catherwood enters with Principalpoop close behind, grumbles something about disrupting his 9:10 PM tree-stunting plans, and hurries off to the sitting room.
Dexter Fong: Hey Poop
Rufus_T_Firetween: EYKIW at Wikipedia - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Everything_You_Know_Is_Wrong
Hawkmoth: not from around here
Garo: No, that was a crazed sterno bum
DJTween: Hey P
Principalpoop: hey there
Hawkmoth: but a real square little fellow
Hawkmoth: I still can recite huge pieces of this hehee.
Garo: Me too
Principalpoop: i want a yellow jacket
MKBorders: please continue
George Leroy: choked to death on a piece of cheese
||||||||| Catherwood escorts Bottles in through the front door at 9:11 PM, picks up his cues (only slightly scorched), and heads for the billiard room.
CS: i'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy
MKBorders: bet ya didn't know the south won the Civil War..
||||||||| Gargi enters at 9:12 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and scurries off to the Haberdashery Barn.
Beet: It's in everybody's eggs
Principalpoop: i made them sleep outside too
Gargi: Greetings. What fun..
Hawkmoth: Beula Balls! er uh Bells.
Principalpoop: go gargi
Dexter Fong: Hi Gargi
CS: fun's where the fair is
Pat Hat: evening papers
Garo: Let's invite over a bunch of immigrants and make cars!
Principalpoop: goodly stretched
MKBorders: oh the warm touch of an Indian
CS: I wonder how long Bergman had Nurgi?
Principalpoop: melody clockwork films
Pat Hat: think of the balls we'll have
MKBorders: for an alternate future
shoes for the dead: cow hard
George Leroy: I die for history!
Beet: I is a professional slave now
George Leroy: we gonna take turns
Dexter Fong: Cat: I believe the term *Nurgi* came from the Goon SHOW
Hawkmoth: I'm back and I'm beautiful! I quote that all the time lol.
George Leroy: and guess who's turn it is now?
Pat Hat: guess whose turn it is now?
MKBorders: we gwen take twurns. and guess whos twurn it is now!
Dexter Fong: The Republicans?
Beet: he fell right over
||||||||| Scooterpoot enters at 9:17 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and dashes off to the Haberdashery Barn.
Principalpoop: a wild bunch of miners
George Leroy: chickens and mexicans
||||||||| Catherwood ushers dvshp inside, makes a note of the time (9:17 PM), then fades off into the distance going on about the waiting room or the sitting room or something.
||||||||| Catherwood escorts elmo into the room, accepts an I.O.U. as a gratuity, mutters something about 9:17 PM, then departs.
Beet: Dead Indian Hero
Garo: Clown milk!
Hawkmoth: Don't eat the blue moss.
Principalpoop: bring libations for everyone catherwood
||||||||| Catherwood brings libations for everyone.
Garo: The Snake is a river
George Leroy: everybody's going down to the hole to get it
MKBorders: hey! everything is turning blue
Principalpoop: caw caw
Gargi: I'm afraid I've lost my place
Dexter Fong: Don't worry gargi, you're still here
George Leroy: Bunny, I got to get out!
Hawkmoth: The aliens, they're in your eggs sir.
Gargi: I'd like to be anywhere at all
Principalpoop: the white buffalo
MKBorders: thier in everyones eggs
Hawkmoth: This sounded so much better on my old stereo than on my computer.
Hawkmoth: Nino was much more in the box on those speakers.
Scooterpoot: Have a nice blue moss, I been whipping em up all afternoon!
MKBorders: see that bear lapping up that water?
Hawkmoth: Real gas music from Jupiter.
George Leroy: God hates the occult
Principalpoop: art holeflapper
Hawkmoth: Youst.
Dexter Fong: He fears it
Bob Rapid: invented the vacation?
DJTween: Don’t forget to check out the Firesign Theatre Funway for a cool page full of Flash goodies. Just move your cursor over various areas of the page - https://firesigntheatrelegacy.com/funway.html
Dexter Fong: the vacination
||||||||| At 9:23 PM, MKBorders vanishes mysteriously -- just as Nino the Mind Boggler predicted!
Gargi: tierra del fuego?
Principalpoop: melt a watch for doctor dali
Pat Hat: Rebus!
Hawkmoth: Dig a big enough hole and anyone will want to jump in it.
kpnanny: Bear Whiz
George Leroy: bearwhiz
||||||||| Catherwood leads DonVila inside, makes a note of the time (9:24 PM), then fades off into the distance going on about the waiting room or the sitting room or something.
Gargi: that's right Pat...
George Leroy: 133!
Hawkmoth: hotter than hooker in Heater and hotter than Heater in Hellmouth. Only years later did I realize Heater and Hellmouth are real towns lol.
Hawkmoth: was right about the comet!
||||||||| It's 9:25 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Bottles - dead from jaundice
||||||||| Klara - dead from dengue fever
||||||||| Happy Harry Cox - dead from the common cold
||||||||| thefast1 - dead from pneumonia
||||||||| Rubber Shoes - dead from Globner's disease
||||||||| leroy - dead from pneumonia
||||||||| Harpster - dead from jaundice
||||||||| yojimbo - dead from jaundice
||||||||| Papoon - dead from the fiddlers
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
kpnanny: hell yes!
Merlyn: Thanks for clearing out the riffraff, Reaper
Pat Hat: I'm here in the desert
Principalpoop: this is no fake pat
||||||||| sallan steals in around 9:26 PM, trying to avoid Catherwood because of last year's "unpleasant incident."
Bob Rapid: hot than hooker in heater
shoes for the dead: chili colorado
Beet: He's the "Square Little Fellow"?
Principalpoop: ghost heart air force range
Dexter Fong: He's *a* square little fellow
DJTween: OK
Hawkmoth: end of side one.
Dexter Fong: OK?
Beet: Turn the record over,Tweet
Principalpoop: A-OK
shoes for the dead: goat's atr?
Hawkmoth: beginning of side 2
kpnanny: Venusian gas music...
George Leroy: all will learn to play the piano
||||||||| Catherwood ushers Anton Globner into the room, accepts an I.O.U. as a gratuity, mumbles something about 9:29 PM, then departs.
Principalpoop: enough of this deception and trickery
George Leroy: hot chocolatal springs
Hawkmoth: Blue moss!
Beet: Funny Namers
||||||||| Catherwood trudges in at 9:33 PM, dragging Gentleman_Rook by one leg and asks "Can anyone vouch for this web surfer?"
Gentleman_Rook: Bugger, I've been legdragged.
Principalpoop: crumbhunger
Bob Rapid: Ray Hamburger
shoes for the dead: ever been to the piss fest, bob?
Pat Hat: ten hut
Principalpoop: goat heart
Bob Rapid: yes, General!
Bob Rapid: AFFUHmative!
Gentleman_Rook: *adjusting my tinfoil hat*
Principalpoop: dry cleaning bags filled with march gas
Pat Hat: what about my eggs, dear?
Principalpoop: marsh even
Hawkmoth: I had a Christmas toy that made that *exact* weird electric bird noise.
Principalpoop: under attack from superior consciousness
Beet: They were fried not scrambled
George Leroy: he out ranks him
Principalpoop: yet he outranks them, his option, command
||||||||| "9:38 PM? 9:38 PM!!" says Catherwood, "bottles should be here by now...oh, THERE you are!" as bottles enters and sits on the divan.
||||||||| Gusts of wind blow in from outside and the thumpa-thumpa-thumpa of helicopter blades is heard as Happy Panditt's chopper lands on the lawn and Elayne falls out at 9:38 PM.
Elayne: Evenin' all!
Dexter Fong: Hi Elyane
George Leroy: the
Gentleman_Rook: By chopper no less! Swanky!
Principalpoop: E Crumbhunger
CS: hi el, you're just in time for my voice
Rufus_T_Firetween: EYKIW at Firesign Media - https://firesigntheatrelegacy.com/media/media.php?item=eykiw
George Leroy: Miss Crebs and the straw coffee
Rufus_T_Firetween: EYKIW at Wiki - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Everything_You_Know_Is_Wrong
DJTween: Hey E
||||||||| It's 9:40 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Uh-clem - dead from The Plague
||||||||| Gernica - dead from measles
||||||||| Scooterpoot - dead from jaundice
||||||||| dvshp - dead from pneumonia
||||||||| elmo - dead from the common cold
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Principalpoop: dreamy may morris
bottles: Hey, I expected SOMEONE to say- " Bottles, what are YOU doing here?"
Elayne: Well, my system doesn't seem to want to play EYKIW...
Elayne: Ah, there we are. Volume problems.
Principalpoop: then I would have to show you mine
Elayne: Excuse me, Bottles? What are YOU doing HERE?
kpnanny: i gotta get oof
Elayne: What ARE you DOING here?
bottles: Ah, that's better.
Elayne: WHAT are you doing here?
Gentleman_Rook: Brava! Nice projection, Elayne. Good form.
||||||||| Dwarf enters at 9:41 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and runs off to the Chapeau Manger.
Elayne: 10Q Gentlemen Rook.
George Leroy: travelqueen
bottles: What are you doing HERE?
Beet: It's slow but reliable
Gentleman_Rook: *wild applause*
Principalpoop: what ARE you doing here?
George Leroy: hole in the wall?
Gentleman_Rook: Holy whole.
Pat Hat: from an ass on the ground....
Elayne: "Well, half a hole, hanyway..."
Gentleman_Rook: The Ert?
George Leroy: bi=nobile
||||||||| A time machine materializes at 9:44 PM and drjawn waltzes out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece.
bottles: @ Principal Poop- you know what I'm doing here.
Gentleman_Rook: But less importantly, what WERE you doing here, Bottles?
Principalpoop: i don't know anything
bottles: Wouldn't that be a raisin from ancient Greece by now?
George Leroy: and breakfast
Elayne: Yes, with your hand up in... hang on, I don't have the part number...
Dexter Fong: Bottles: Time travel is instantaneous
Bob Rapid: erection lasting mor than four hours
Principalpoop: and instantly too
bottles: Thank you, Tiny Dr. T.
Gentleman_Rook: Need to find you a whole in that case.
kpnanny: I smell bacon
Principalpoop: breakfast smell and a golden staircase
bottles: Perhaps it's the erection.
Pat Hat: I fell in the whole!
Gentleman_Rook: You've got a loggerhead?
Dexter Fong: Perhaps it's a upscale Denny's
George Leroy: bi-nobil
George Leroy: bi-noble
Dexter Fong: Bye Noble
Principalpoop: in the mouse skin blue uniforms
Gentleman_Rook: SO handsome. Striking, really.
bottles: I love a man in uniform.
Beet: Hello Cox
Gentleman_Rook: I hear next year they're going for moleskin.
kpnanny: By no Bull
Principalpoop: where did everybody go?
Gentleman_Rook: With matching fishskin ties.
Beet: Or is it only . . .
Principalpoop: seekers
||||||||| Catherwood enters with ThisIsNino close behind, grumbles something about disrupting his 9:49 PM tree-stunting plans, and dashes off to the sitting room.
Elayne: Thanks Tween, nice hearing that one again, even coming in late as I did.
bottles: What exactly is moleskin"?
kpnanny: c curse
George Leroy: my favorite record
||||||||| Catherwood walks up and snorts derisively "Presenting 'pNose II', just granted probation at 9:50 PM", then leaves hurriedly.
bottles: There is a sitting room?
Elayne: Wow, you've got Cat on Skype! Way cool.
Elayne: I guess that's why he's not here?
Gentleman_Rook: If you look very carefully at your garden variety mole, you'll notice a tiny, body-length zipper. Unzip him and voila, moleskin. Handy for writing on, also.
Principalpoop: this is london, are we reaching?
Elayne: I still haven't entered the Skype era. No camera on my monitor.
Elayne: Can you do Skype without a camera? Like voice only?
bottles: I'm afraid my familiarity with moles is not that intimate.
Gentleman_Rook: Yup. If you've got an iPhone you can get the ap for free.
Beet: Yes
Principalpoop: you are into warts instead?
||||||||| Catherwood ushers Señor Tirebiter into the room, accepts a $3 bill as a gratuity, grumbles something about 9:51 PM, then departs.
Gentleman_Rook: Ah bottles, you don't know what you've missed. You should invite some over to tea and roots one day. Sparkling coversationalists, your mole.
||||||||| Around 9:52 PM, drjawn walks off into the sunset...
bottles: I had always suspected so.
Gentleman_Rook: Well, not YOUR mole per se. I've never met your mole personally.
Principalpoop: they love eating quacamole
Elayne: No iPhone here, Gentlemen Rock. Does it work with an Android phone?
Gentleman_Rook: I was speaking mole-in-general.
bottles: Your loss
Gentleman_Rook: I'm sure, Elayne. Do a search in your ap store, I'm sure there's a free account setup. It's quite handy.
Gentleman_Rook: Not as handy as a moleskin or three, but you know, you take what you can get with modern tech.
bottles: Have you a large circle of mole chums?
ThisIsNino: Hey, kids. What am I listening to?
Elayne: I have it on my desktop computer, but I'm not sure I have any microphones set up...
Beet: MOLE EATERS!
Elayne: Off to the app store, briefly...
Gentleman_Rook: Would you pick me up a bottle of cheap port while you're there, Elayne?
Elayne: Okie-doke, it's installing.
||||||||| It's 9:55 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Dwarf - dead from Globner's disease
||||||||| DonVila - dead from jaundice
||||||||| Yucaipa Heat - dead from pneumonia
||||||||| sallan - dead from dengue fever
||||||||| Anton Globner - dead from The Plague
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
bottles: Ah, a cheap port sort of fellow. I see.
Elayne: I'll check, GenRook.
Principalpoop: another skyper
CS: is that the skype noise?
Gentleman_Rook: Oh yes, no question about it. None of that good stuff for me, thanks.
Principalpoop: thanks cat, good to hear your voice
Elayne: Nope, no hooch on Google Play, I fear.
bottles: I love a man who knows his limitations.
||||||||| A time machine materializes at 9:56 PM and mrblueandyellow steps out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece.
Elayne: Hi Cat, it was nice to hear your voice again. :)
Gentleman_Rook: Another ancient Grecian grape.
CS: it was nice to use it
bottles: And yet another time traveler.
Gentleman_Rook: Is there an ancient Grecian grapevine nearby? *peering under the couch*
CS: Fumiyo just returned from Japan so I probably sounded happy
Rufus_T_Firetween: Neal Ah-MID - http://www.seemreal.com/nealamid/index.htm
Elayne: You did. Welcome back, Fumiyo! Visiting family, I presume?
bottles: Hey can I have some of HIS purple berries?
CS: new grand neice
Dexter Fong: Tween: It's amid, as in amidst
Gentleman_Rook: More importantly, did you bring us an ancient Grecian grape?
CS: mostly just hanging with buddies and eating exotic food
Elayne: Aww, that's lovely, a new grand-neice!
bottles: Unfortunately, we drank all the ancient grape.
Gentleman_Rook: Elayne was looking for some fairly modern grape, but I think the lure of technology distracted her.
CS: to go with grand nephew from other nephew
||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 10 O'CLOCK", then silently exits.
CS: i wish the gap had released more of their radio stuff. it was spectacular
bottles: Actually, the time in NY is 10 o'clock.
kpnanny: question...if it aint shun grape is it friendly?
bottles: Grapes are amongst the friendliest of fruits.
bottles: Just thinik of all the lovely things they let us do to them.
kpnanny: they DO come in clusters...
bottles: See there we go. More proof.
kpnanny: 80 proof?
bottles: Possibly possibly
CS: those kind of and rapidity of jokes reminds me of Giant Rat
||||||||| Catherwood stumbles in at 10:05 PM, dragging uh clem by one foot and asks "Can anyone vouch for this yo-yo?"
CS: "on high" means what you think it means
bottles: But 80 proof is so rude, really. Rather something one can sip all night without ralphin on one's date.
Elayne: Ooh, director's commentary, I love it!@
||||||||| Outside, the 10:06 PM downtown bus from Funfun Town pulls away, leaving moseshawk coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes.
kpnanny: what if you're dating ralph?
Elayne: What year did you record Neil Amid, Cat?
CS: carolyn cassady has spoken of how they tried to keep the fact they were stoned out of his stories. "on high" wasn't tryhing very hard
CS: 1997
bottles: Never happen. My father had that unfortunate name and when he passed they retired his name.
bottles: Ah poor Ralph. To have a name synonymous with puking. Rather sad, really.
kpnanny: So how tired was he?
bottles: Completely exhausted. Never seen anything like it.
CS: what aobut having a name for prostitute's customers, and toilets
kpnanny: yeah...sin on a mosse would tire anyone
kpnanny: moose
||||||||| It's 10:10 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| mrblueandyellow - dead from Globner's disease
||||||||| Gentleman_Rook - dead from the common cold
||||||||| Hawkmoth - dead from measles
||||||||| Garo - dead from intense demonic possession
||||||||| Bob Rapid - dead from the common cold
||||||||| ThisIsNino - dead from the fiddlers
||||||||| pNose II - dead from the yaws
||||||||| Señor Tirebiter - dead from dengue fever
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
||||||||| Outside, the 10:11 PM uptown bus from Dayton pulls away, leaving Jules coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes.
||||||||| Catherwood accompanies DrWho42 into the room, accepts a $3 bill as a gratuity, mumbles something about 10:11 PM, then departs.
CS: currently playing: Visions of Neal and the 3 Stooges, by Jack Kerouac
||||||||| At 10:11 PM, Jules vanishes mysteriously -- just as Nino the Mind Boggler predicted!
CS: whil will be left when Neal Amid commences?
bottles: Jack Kerouac was one of the 3 stooges?
Dexter Fong: He could be at times
kpnanny: No, he was the three stages...
bottles: Well, I never.
bottles: 3 Stages of what?
Dexter Fong: Syphilis
kpnanny: De Nile
bottles: I thought that was Hemingway.
||||||||| A time machine materializes at 10:15 PM and wavy bounds out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece.
Dexter Fong: How do wavy?
bottles: Oh please not aint shun grease again
kpnanny: yes...a slippery slope
bottles: Are you related to Wavy Gravy?
||||||||| New notice: '** currently playing - Cat Simril’s NEAL AMID (featuring members of the FST) + Misc Skits- listen to the stream at 128k at http://listen.ehhh.us:8000/tweeny.m3u or at 16k for dial-up users at http://listen.ehhh.us:8000/tweeny16k.m3u'
bottles: I met him once at Woodstock. Nice man. Smelled vile.
kpnanny: what was in the vial?
DJTween: mmmmmm gravy
bottles: Is that like when George W says "squirrel"?
Rufus_T_Firetween: Neal aMID - http://www.seemreal.com/nealamid/index.htm
||||||||| wavy rushes off, saying "10:18 PM? Mark Time is almost on! Where's a radio?"
||||||||| Catherwood enters with wavy close behind, mutters something about disrupting his 10:18 PM tree-stunting plans, and scurries off to the anteroom.
bottles: Vial- I was hoping for deodorant but no luck.
wavy: where burning Sappho loved and sang and stroked the wine-dark sea
kpnanny: WHere is the Aunt Tea Room?
bottles: It's over there behind that hut made totally of ghee.
||||||||| Outside, the 10:20 PM uptown bus from Hellmouth pulls away, leaving Bunnyboy coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes.
Bunnyboy: Lo dere
Dexter Fong: HI Bunny
CS: hi bunny. check out the kerouac
bottles: My roommate had a lovely dog named Sappho.
Rufus_T_Firetween: Neal Ah-MID - http://www.seemreal.com/nealamid/index.htm << I'd rather have a President mispronounce 'squirrel' than 'nuclear'
Rufus_T_Firetween: oops, wrong paste
kpnanny: you can't say nuclear, and that really scares me
Rufus_T_Firetween: Is that like when George W says "squirrel"? << Is that like when George W says "squirrel"?
Rufus_T_Firetween: darn!
kpnanny: must seek the light...
bottles: Now say altogether now - Nucular.
Rufus_T_Firetween: Is that like when George W says "squirrel"? << I'd rather have a President mispronounce 'squirrel' than 'nuclear'
||||||||| Pat Hat leaves at 10:21 PM, singing "Oh, I'm just a little fishy, floating in the sea, and there ain't no hook that's smart enough to catch the likes of me..."
Bunnyboy: Wherezat SHIBBOLETH?
CS: that was Fumiyo's voice- stranger
CS: you missed kerouc but you can hear neal amid
bottles: Neal amid what? The trees, ferns?
George Leroy: dim-a-lean
CS: many things, people
bottles: I would like to be amid a hot tub.
CS: that's doc technical as neal armstrong
CS: my old cat ernie
||||||||| It's 10:25 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Gargi - dead from pneumonia
||||||||| Elayne - dead from the yaws
||||||||| uh clem - dead from the yaws
||||||||| moseshawk - dead from pneumonia
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
George Leroy: extra cheddar?
CS: austin insisted i start it this way
Bunnyboy: Muh nose is still drooping over the porch, waiting for the script.
CS: my voice sounds odd there
DJTween: a very danger-esque opening
bottles: Is there an echo in this room?
||||||||| Catherwood ushers Poaustin into the room, accepts three dimes as a gratuity, mutters something about 10:27 PM, then departs.
wavy: Ah Nicky Son - My topless flower of Toyko Delight! O, baby! Where are you now?!
CS: wow, ,here's neal austin himself
DJTween: Phil is pissed off?
Dexter Fong: Hi Mr PRESIDENT
CS: phil and oona
bottles: Regnad Kcin
Bunnyboy: Hi, Prezzers!
Bunnyboy: Hi Oona!
Rufus_T_Firetween: Ah, of course! Hi Oona :)
||||||||| A stretch dumpster pulls up to the front door at 10:29 PM; Paustin gets out and signs a few autographs before entering the Waiting room.
Rufus_T_Firetween: and welcome, Phil
Paustin: Not sure if I signed in correctly
Dexter Fong: A dual appearance
bottles: Paustin- you look just fine.
Rufus_T_Firetween: Well, you're red as you should be
Paustin: Red is good
bottles: Who's a red?
CS: good to see you, phil
George Leroy: tomarrow starts yesterday
Bunnyboy: Waitin' on SHIBBOLETH...
||||||||| "10:31 PM? 10:31 PM!!" says Catherwood, "Dorfeus should be here by now...oh, THERE you are!" as Dorfeus enters and sits on the divan.
DJTween: Show how's the farming coming, Phil?
Dorfeus: Greetings and salivations...
CS: the writer being me
Beet: Hi
Dorfeus: I have brought the crown drools...
DJTween: "You've got a still I could invent Taoism from" lol - great line
Dorfeus: We are all in moral danger here I see...
Dorfeus: This divan is like sitting on a big hand...
George Leroy: oh Neal! Neal! Neal!
Bunnyboy: I'm working one of my unwritten bucket list items: watching all 5 seasons of ROCKY & BULLWINKLE.
Dorfeus: Whatsa matter, Leroy? Cat got your tongue?
Dorfeus: He's got mine- that's why I'm writing...
CS: that was tom satriano, fomrer Angel and Red Sox
George Leroy: more bearwhiz beer please!
George Leroy: more cheddar!
CS: thats proctor
Paustin: There's going to be, soon, an FST radio station. Anyone got ideas about programming it?
Dorfeus: Hello, Tom. I am a lifelong Red Sox fan. Really!
CS: oh wow
CS: roomed with s;paceman lee
Dorfeus: I'm getting traded for two Yankees fans and a picture of Ethel Merman.
CS: lol
CS: you mean all firesign all the time, or new stuff?
||||||||| It's 10:40 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Poaustin - dead from pneumonia
||||||||| kpnanny - dead from dengue fever
||||||||| DrWho42 - dead from intense demonic possession
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
CS: a pod cast ala rfo?
Dexter Fong: Phil A: How much airtime are you looking at; will there be an attempt to produce new material?
Dorfeus: Ah yes, Spaceman Lee... Ted Williams respected Spaceman as being a thoughtful pitcher
CS: happily use any of this, phil
Dorfeus: I'm dead from not dying. Better luck next time...
Bunnyboy: Dueling Philibusters, with Ossman moderating.
Dorfeus: or unhappily... your choice...
George Leroy: open up the tired eye
Bunnyboy: "Ooooh! You deaded me!"
CS: we love our gods so much, we mistake it reciprocity
Beet: Third eye?
CS: one of my favourite lines
Dorfeus: Yes, the third eye... always meddling, arten't you?
Dexter Fong: They killed BUnny, those bastards!!!!
CS: FOR reciprocity
Dorfeus: or is that 'middling? As in fair to...
Dorfeus: Bunny's dead? Doers he know?
George Leroy: it's Italian
Dexter Fong: Bunny will be alive next week
CS: that was kind of how to make a /pa/ sound
George Leroy: paste for everybody!
Dorfeus: Live? Performing what?
Bunnyboy: Schroedinger's Bunny: I'm still in the box!
CS: needed more of a break there but i told peter too late
Beet: The case if the missing references
Dorfeus: When I opened the Box, you were... DEAD!
George Leroy: where?
Dorfeus: Over there- behind the pompadour...
George Leroy: is that bearwhiz beer?!
Dorfeus: Nice do, hon...
||||||||| Buck sashays in at 10:46 PM carrying an obsidian door knocker.
Bunnyboy: But I'm tan, and handsome!
Dorfeus: Nice knockers... for a guy...
CS: are you looking for something in particular, phil?
DJTween: Coming next week, "In The Next World You're On Your Own"
Dorfeus: I'll say... but then, I'd say anything...
CS: krassner's joke was he thought the name of the new drug was "czar"
Buck: some one drop this?
CS: that's my daughter
Dorfeus: We're on our own what? The mystery deepens...
Rufus_T_Firetween: Paustin: There's going to be, soon, an FST radio station. Anyone got ideas about programming it? << sounds cool, Phil :)
CS: sleep well, tutan khamun?
George Leroy: (lightning strikes)
Paustin: Cat: yeah, I need to fill up a lot of time.
shoes for the dead: this is great, Cat
Dorfeus: Thunder breaks
Buck: of course we own our what!
George Leroy: buy a golden bladder...
CS: this is the best thing i've ever done
CS: you want more stuff like this, phil?
Dorfeus: Thank God! I thought our you know what was owned by you know who!
Dorfeus: For who knows what for...
Beet: Log Out Run Off MEMORY
CS: you want fanzine nick danger episodes?
Dorfeus: Rocky Rococo has been replaced by the Medieval Genius!
Rufus_T_Firetween: A whole lot of rare stuff out there that's never been heard, from what people say
George Leroy: zip-beep!
Dorfeus: If it's never been heard, then how do you know it even exists?
Dexter Fong: I told him Dorf
Dorfeus: I love a good mystery!
Dorfeus: Have you got a light?
Dexter Fong: You're following me aren't you?
Dorfeus: Did you tell him off- or is he onto what we're telling him?
Rufus_T_Firetween: Dorfeus: If it's never been heard, then how do you know it even exists? << it was whispered to me by Nino The Mind Boggler
Paustin: I'd like to start making a list of what's available. Is Facebook the best way to compile?
Dorfeus: I'm NOT following you! You just happened to be walking right in front of me!
Rufus_T_Firetween: I'm sure no FB expert
Dexter Fong: Phil: Are you talking about FST stuff only?
CS: that's not really a limit, phil. what are you looking for?
George Leroy: boom town dust!
Paustin: FST or stuff about FST.
CS: i gave you all the stuff i had
Beet: Isn't Ossman kind of a pack rat for FST material?
shoes for the dead: pre-script
Dorfeus: If you stop suddenly, we'll both have a lot of explianing ti do...
CS: you have packer's archives?
Dexter Fong: I'd think David O is the best source for things, no?
Dorfeus: I'm under a bad spell...
||||||||| It's 10:55 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Mad Mike - dead from Globner's disease
||||||||| bottles - dead from The Plague
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Dorfeus: Why, I've got the... Plague!
CS: there are A LOT of radio interviews over the years. you're referring to that?
George Leroy: or globners
Dorfeus: Suddenly, the silence was deafening... which makes sense...
Beet: Levels of creation the same as different states of awareness?
Dexter Fong: what??
Beet: Just a thought
CS: thnis culd be bergman's death, anyone's
Dexter Fong: Phil: You might consider running Goon shows from time to time
George Leroy: levels of awareness are states of creation?
Dorfeus: Globner's Disease! That was my favorite! That's the only time I got any hot buttered grote clusters, you know... Porcelain always enjoyed them, too
Dorfeus: She still makes the bed, you know!
||||||||| Catherwood stomps in at 10:58 PM, dragging kentkb by one foot and asks "Can anyone vouch for this yo-yo?"
CS: you mean stuff like credibilty gap? tween opened the show with a riff i taped off the radio, forget which station, their 3 stooges piece during the la phone strike
Beet: We know there are many dimensions we can't see. What if we could see?
Rufus_T_Firetween: Well, at least you shared the clusters with the maid
Buck: I just had my 1 minute birthday. My sixty second bithd
Dorfeus: No, I can't. It looks a bit stringy to me...
shoes for the dead: i've been on Neal's Bus for decades
Buck: and I didnt last.
Dorfeus: I thought you went first!
||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 11 O'CLOCK", then silently exits.
Beet: Wow, neat!
Dorfeus: Well, as long as you've gone... everything will be as right as rain...
CS: that was all the women's voices in his life echoing at the instant of his death
shoes for the dead: Thanks Cat!!
Rufus_T_Firetween: Cool play, cease
CS: your welcome. thanks phil too
Beet: That was great.
Dorfeus: I think I must be going as well... judging by the wet spot on my pants
DJTween: lol
shoes for the dead: yes, Phil, Good job!
Principalpoop: certainly was not derivative my goodness
||||||||| New notice: 'Lily Bergman College Fund - -Remember to help Peter Bergman’s daughter with her college experience by donating to the Lily Bergman College fund - https://firesigntheatrelegacy.com/lilyfund/'
CS: is this station going to be like rfo has been?
Dorfeus: But, seriously- how can you tell the difference between a kiss from a beautiful woman and the sting of a rabid scorpion?
Paustin: Anyone with ideas for shows of their own or material we don't have in the archives, let me know on Facebook and thanks.
Paustin: FST or stuff about FST.
Beet: You could do "Incarnations of Firesign" Live shows, alnums, XM radio etc., etc.
CS: that reminds me, this sounds like something lily bergman might be interested in
CS: so we should talk to you through facebook, phil?
George Leroy: caddis...
Dexter Fong: Thanks Tweeny
Principalpoop: thank you tween, keep that mouse and cursor moving hehe
CS: the most possible thanks, tween
Beet: Thanks again Tween and nice to meet you, Phil? G'night
DJTween: Well, you've got a DJ for a couple of hours on Thursday, if you like :)
George Leroy: Dear Friends
Dexter Fong: Let's eat?
George Leroy: dinner at 8
DJTween: Until last time, again...
Dexter Fong: and only 7 spoons
Bunnyboy: Puzzle Box!
Dorfeus: Eat it, eat it raw! Rah, rah, rah! That's the spirit!
George Leroy: hot dog!
||||||||| "11:08 PM? I'm late!" exclaims DJTween, who then dashes out through the french doors and down through the brambles.
||||||||| At 11:08 PM, Rufus_T_Firetween vanishes mysteriously -- just as Nino the Mind Boggler predicted!
Dexter Fong: Night DJ and Rufus
||||||||| Catherwood trudges in at 11:08 PM, dragging Porcelain by one foot and asks "Can anyone vouch for this yahoo?"
Paustin: We have a nice sponsor in Real Goods Solar and a couple of smaller outfits. Bill McIntyre is program director.
Dorfeus: This is wonderful! It's all coming back to me! It's starting to look a little menacing, though!
CS: wow
CS: good work phil
CS: you are looking for ads?
Dorfeus: What's that in the corner?
CS: you have done a lot with bill, haven't you?
Porcelain begins to tidy up
||||||||| It's 11:10 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| wavy - dead from measles
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Dorfeus: Can I help you make the bed, Porcelain?
Paustin: We can accept ads, but that's not the main focus
Porcelain: Please!
CS: which is?
Dorfeus: Where's Porgy?
Porcelain exclaims "oh my, oh my!"
George Leroy: at school
Dorfeus: I'll be late for breakfast!
Bunnyboy: I gotta feed us'ns. Great news, Phil! Nitey, all!
CS: how is this unlike bergman's unsponsored podcast?
Dorfeus: George, the school has disappeared!
George Leroy: or has it?
CS: by bun
Principalpoop: hip hop bunny
Dorfeus: Does that mean that that Porgy has disappeared, too?
Dorfeus: Good old Schroedinger High!
George Leroy: !
||||||||| Bunnyboy leaves at 11:13 PM, singing "Oh, I'm just a little fishy, floating in the sea, and there ain't no hook that's smart enough to catch the likes of me..."
Paustin: Sponsored would be the difference, and being 100 percent about firesign theatre
CS: so, not other people's stuff?
Dexter Fong: How many hours on a day?
Dorfeus: I'll never forget, you can be sure of that!
George Leroy: shoes for industry!
||||||||| triad 106 enters at 11:15 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and hurries off to the Chapeau Manger.
Dorfeus: Still laying the asphalt?
CS: tween just played Neal Amid and he will also play Red Shift and Box of Time because you are in them and its a firesign show. but not An Infinite Trilogy becasue you're not in them
Principalpoop: a loop of all your stuff play continuously, except for commercials? that would work...
Dorfeus: across the face of tiiiiimmmmmeeeeee...
Paustin: Other peoples stuff if it relates to FST in a pretty direct way
CS: you got access to the krla oz? that would be a treat
Porcelain: who knows? who cares?
Dorfeus: I feel like Linda Blair's Exorcist character at a tea party...
CS: ala goons in ref to by the light of the silvery
Dorfeus: Does anyone here bite tires?
Dorfeus: You're lacking sulfir in your diet...
Dexter Fong: I'd like a side order of wall
CS: is there a central compiler for incoming firesign stuff? i dont wnat taylor to be overburdened
Dorfeus: sulfur... What was wrong? 'UR' hehe
Principalpoop: my guess is that most is ahh radio ready, there would some that needs audio editing stuff done...
CS: dex you have your wbai shows, right?
Paustin: Bill McIntyre is program director.
Dorfeus: Hey, you could call 'Audio Murphy" for all your recording needs
Dexter Fong: Cat: Not for the most part
CS: are you looking for your many radio interviews over the decades?
CS: what you played for me whan i visited you could be what phil is looking for
Dexter Fong: Gotta park a car, see y'all next week
Principalpoop: hail rita fong
||||||||| Dexter Fong departs at 11:20 PM, singing "Toad away, toad away; toad away, toad away! Where do you go when you're toad away?"
Principalpoop: ciao
Dorfeus: I hope Phil finds it...
CS: think about phil's offer when you park, dex
CS: my happy dog Icy has just joined me. Fumiyo returned from Japan
||||||||| triad 106 leaves at 11:21 PM, singing "Oh, I'm just a little fishy, floating in the sea, and there ain't no hook that's smart enough to catch the likes of me..."
Paustin: Yeah, interviews would be interesting. All that will go through Taylor.
Dorfeus: We're all looking for something. Me? I'm just looking for something to look for... It's better when it's simpler, eh?
||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood intones: "11:22 PM and late as usual, it's triad 106, just back from Billville."
Principalpoop: there is a danish saying that loosely translates as travel is fun but home is best
Dorfeus: Good to see you, Catherwood! That means my eyesight has returned!
||||||||| Catherwood meanss Dorfeus's eyesight has returned.
CS: shall i talk to him about that? i'm sure i've given him my list of interviews but they are a drop in the kicked bucket
CS: and dont you need clearances for such?
Merlyn: hey phil! I was off
Dorfeus: Uh oh! Is this a bad case of deja vu? Or just a bad case of beans?
CS: dont tell us about your sex life, take place in
CS: Real LIfe
Principalpoop: All Firesign! All The TIme! I like the sound of that....
CS: merl can magically congure some pseudo firesign episodes at will
Dorfeus: Sex Life... Is that the sequel to Boys Life?
||||||||| It's 11:25 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| shoes for the dead - dead from The Plague
||||||||| George Leroy - dead from jaundice
||||||||| Beet - dead from pneumonia
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
CS: maybe new productions by the firesign kids. they're very creative
||||||||| At 11:25 PM, Porcelain vanishes mysteriously -- just as Nino the Mind Boggler predicted!
Dorfeus: I'll just turn on the radio...
Dorfeus: Hmmm... Something about the Pharoahs...
Paustin: How about a program called "Thursday Night Chat"?
Dorfeus: Did they fall over or are they being fun?
CS: you mean do this in audio?
CS: skype?
Dorfeus: Program? Or POGROM? That might boost the ratings...
CS: that is what tween was been trying to set up on this chat
CS: alas, only my voice
Dorfeus: The Boston Pops could make, 'Fiedler in the Roof'
Dorfeus: on
CS: i have better fingers than vocal chords
Paustin: Yeah, is there a way to pull off audio, even if it's simulated?
CS: but it is a great idea
Dorfeus: Let's hear you sing...
Principalpoop: you mean hire actors to read from the cheese log? i want a voice like howard cosell for me....
CS: merl will know
Merlyn: what kind of simulated audio?
Dorfeus: Isn't writing a form of simulated audio?
Principalpoop: i was thinking the same thing, as I read that out loud hehe
Paustin: I'm thinking voice robot translation, horrible as it is, still really interesting.
Principalpoop: don't wake the voices in my head again, oh no please
Merlyn: they can get pretty good now
Merlyn: Stephen Hawking has a difficult time keeping his old "voice"
Principalpoop: most of us spell pretty good, a smart crowd here
CS: lol merl
Dorfeus: Those aren't voices in your head... they're just aliens using your fillings as a transmitter!
Merlyn: also see http://www.mchawking.com
Dorfeus: We're all under the same spell is all...
Principalpoop: no, the aliens work at the other end of my body hehe
Dorfeus: I guess that's where you're doing your fillingthen, eh?
Principalpoop: wrong chat dorfeus, careful
CS: is ther a youtube channel with this radio, phil?
CS: orf is that too much work?
Paustin: Seriously. Is there a way to make thurs nite chat into audio that could be a program on FST Radio?
Dorfeus: Is this a chat room? I thought it was my dorm room! I've been switched- which hurt at first, but then became increasingly more arousing...
CS: yes. it could be done.
CS: a skype chat?
Principalpoop: with skype, people could call in, or somebody live reading and commenting on the actual chat would work...
Merlyn: well, it could be read out, but I think it would be better to have a simultaneous skype call-in
Dorfeus: Nothing is impossible! Just... irrelevant!
Principalpoop: oh M, i thought like you, wow lol
Paustin: Who would record the skype ?
CS: a skypette
Principalpoop: the person with the paid version hehe
Merlyn: it shouldn't be hard to set up, I think tween can right now
Merlyn: but wouldn't a live call-in be better than recording it?
Dorfeus: Well, sell tickets and you could have skype scalpers
Merlyn: it would still be recorded if you need it
||||||||| 11:38 PM: Gargi jumps out of the hall closet saying "I've been listening to all of you talking about me for the past half hour!"
Dorfeus: you might break all records!
CS: dont wreck the records
||||||||| Outside, the 11:39 PM bus from Funfun Town pulls away, leaving Woody 1 coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes.
Principalpoop: hey woody
Paustin: Live call -in means you can't see all your fellow callers, and to me the charm of thurs nites is the seeing of others.
||||||||| It's 11:40 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| kentkb - dead from the common cold
||||||||| triad 106 - dead from the common cold
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Woody 1: I'm black and I'm beautiful.
Principalpoop: we listened to that earlier woody
CS: so how then is this to be done?
Merlyn: we can skype and type and be in two places at once
Dorfeus: So, Woody... are you a... piano?
CS: you want audio, right?
Dorfeus: How many more guesses do I get?
CS: Dave can come back, and his music
Dorfeus: So, DS- would you rather have Dave OR his music?
CS: i think a lot of the old chatters would return.
CS: manyh have a radio back ground
Principalpoop: when are you going to upgrade to 3-D HD chat M?
Woody 1: Hey, Principal. No, but I'm a playable instrument. 2nd guess?
CS: one reason we loved firesign
Dorfeus: I mean DS... I get you two confused all the time. Hopefully you're not still confused
Principalpoop: huh? ahh you are talking to dorfeus
Woody 1: Iu's weird.
Dorfeus: O boy! Oboe?
Merlyn: ʍou ʇxǝʇ ןɐuoısuǝɯıp ǝǝɹɥʇ ǝʌɐɥ ǝʍ
Woody 1: It's
Principalpoop: I was about to say, we cover way too many dimensions here already hehe
Dorfeus: You're a painted french horn!
CS: i think there is a lot of potential in finding firesing stuff to play
CS: must be hundreds of hours of interviews
Merlyn: there's tons of it
Woody 1: OK. Forget the instrument. Let's get to more intangible merchandise.
Dorfeus: Lacquered, liquored and lathered! Thursday night with the Norse gods!
CS: you said someone is activiely searching for the interviews now? taylor?
CS: maybe fred could help. he has a great archives
Dorfeus: Woody, how about giving me an interview?
Woody 1: Tell me about it. We have an answer for nearly everything.
Principalpoop: you could take any 5 minutes of performance and easily have 25 minutes of analysis and discussion...
Woody 1: It could get dirty.
Dorfeus: Fred hasgreat legs, too... he gets them from all that lag time here at the station...
Paustin: Since Taylor is the official archivist, he will control the master lists of all material. Hell be the one to determine what is original and what is extraneous.
Dorfeus: Dirty is how I like it... Sgt. Sphincter...
||||||||| uhClem enters at 11:47 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and rushes off to the Haberdashery Barn.
Principalpoop: like cats play, lordy, the opportunities for topics and tangents, lordy
Dorfeus: I have questions and I have answers... They just don't dance together yet...
Principalpoop: i do guess facebook would be the best place for a call of any outstanding material that people have out there....
Dorfeus: But I'll face the music, Sergeant... if you'll just sign my dance card...
Dorfeus: Ah yes... the Topic of Cancer... I read the book...
Woody 1: Let's get down to meaty ol' legs. Monroe? Rita Hayworth?
Principalpoop: Mae West
Woody 1: Yep. She'll do.
Dorfeus: As well as 'Tails of the Soup Specific.' They made that one into a musical. A musical what I'll never know...
CS: How about Peter Paul and Hary, Bergman with Krassner and Shearer
Dorfeus: Merle Oberon...
Principalpoop: I heard fanny arbuckle had great gams
CS: tons and tons of bergman recordings,
Dorfeus: Yes. Great... big... gams...
Woody 1: Oberon was a beauty. Those eyes.
Dorfeus: Oh, no! Now we're going to have another Hayes'commission!
Principalpoop: i always loved the expression :she has legs all the way up to her ass"
CS: i think you might have a go here, phil
Dorfeus: and all this time I thought they went down to the floor! But those feet just keep getting in the weay!
CS: not just the quanity but the unique quality
Principalpoop: ok, practice interviews, on the 3rd album, 2nd side about half way you said something, what did you mean by it?
Dorfeus: I have her eyes... in a jar that I keep by the door... what are they for?
Woody 1: Kaley Kuoko--Big Bang. Hubba hubba, George.
Paustin: Poop: what are you talking about? You'll have to remind me.
Dorfeus: Shoes for industry!
Principalpoop: i was pulling your leg, folks will have personal favorite lines they want explaned...
Merlyn: Gotta hit the sack -- phil, keep me (and doc and taylor) posted in email, we can kick it around if you like
CS: poop is acting like you will be talked to in a phone in
Principalpoop: thanks again M, night
CS: e-in
Paustin: Merl. Ok
Dorfeus: I'm beside myself! Which one will notice first?
CS: yeah include me too, phil
Woody 1: Hi, Phil. Didn't recognize the new name right away, but to color. Always a pleasure.
Principalpoop: i wondered when you would acknowledge him woody hehe
||||||||| At 11:57 PM, Merlyn hurries out the door saying "Hey, mister ice-cream man, I've got a nickel, wait for meeeee..."
Woody 1: I gradueated 6th grade.
Dorfeus: I always liked, 'He's no fun- he fell right over.'
Paustin: Woody. Acknowledged.
Dorfeus: Am I in the right place? I'm looking for small fishnet stockings, please!
Woody 1: Bless you, dude. "Is this the beginning or the end? No. It's the end."
Dorfeus: Which floor is that?
Dorfeus: My real name isn't Dorfeus, but now I've forgotten my real name! What should I do first?
Paustin: Thanks, Cat.
||||||||| Catherwood walks in wearing his pyjamas, yawns, and mumbles "It's midnight here in New York city"...then he falls over and starts snoring loudly..
Dorfeus: I'm growing drowsy, but at least I'm still growing... Always look on the bright side I always say...
Dorfeus: We aim to please here at the Headquarters of the Department of Redundancy Department Headquarters...
Dorfeus: Am I the only one in the room? What a terrifying thought!
Principalpoop: i have the same problem with your work that I do with good poetry
Woody 1: No.
Dorfeus: I'll just look under the old cancas cover there in the corner. Someone's bound to be hiding in here someplace...
Principalpoop: half of me wants to simply enjoy it and other half wants to analyse it to enjoy it
Dorfeus: canvas
CS: I should contact just
CS: Taylor then?
Dorfeus: Well, there are the halfs and the half nots...
||||||||| Buck again sneaks in around 12:05 AM, trying to avoid Catherwood because of last night's "unpleasant incident."
Woody 1: I saw the Not Insane live video at a theatre open up for Let It Be. Very nice.
Dorfeus: or were those the half knots? No wonder Catherwood looked rather undone...
||||||||| Catherwood strides up to Dorfeus and asks "Did you want something?"
||||||||| Klara steps in at 12:06 AM carrying an obsidian door knocker.
Dorfeus: Yes, but wanting and getting are very different things. I learned that in summer camp...
Klara: Hello, again
Principalpoop: when the car door closes, on the freeway which is already in progress, we are in that second place that is not anywhere at all
Principalpoop: hey klara
Dorfeus: and again, Klara! May I I hold your knockers?
Woody 1: Mind ia blank as to the correct name of the FT video. Have it but can't find it at the moment.
Dorfeus: I mean to make a sound to summon the butler, of course
Klara: no, sir.
Dorfeus: ah, the Butler isn't sound, then?
Dorfeus: He must be ill, then. It's all clear to me now...
Principalpoop: you don't have the correct mage level to summon a butler, summon a wolf maybe
CS: how about a series of commentaries by firesigns about various goon shows and others
CS: ossman did something like this on his shows
Dorfeus: Everyone knows he did it...
Klara: or perhaps a bit too much wine; Knocked out
||||||||| It's 12:10 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Buck - dead from the common cold
||||||||| Gargi - dead from jaundice
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
Woody 1: Everything comedy great is referenced by Firesign.
Principalpoop: Talk about Lenny Bruce being arrested for telling dirty jokes in a nightclub... have things changed...
Klara: I found this yesterday http://youtu.be/SAPsQRU_WIA
Dorfeus: and now for something completely different! Ahhhh, wrong crowd. Sorry!
Woody 1: "Thank you, mask man."
Dorfeus: Dig this crazy silver bullet! Go get it after I shoot it, okay, Tonto?
Woody 1: "That no mathk, Tantric, That birth defect." Perfect.
CS: that was my favourite lenny bruce rif
Dorfeus: So, is this a REAL chat room?
Dorfeus: Or a semi-pseudo faux chit chat room?
Woody 1: "To perform an unnatural act."
CS: good point, dorfues
CS: we would all need vocal chords
CS: no harpsichords need apply
Dorfeus: All acting is unnatural, if you ask me. Ya gotta be like somebody else, y'know. Really unnatural...
Principalpoop: that is it, i will make youtube videos reading filthy case law from law books while someone plays a bongo
Dorfeus: I have the missing chord... How could it be missing, then?
||||||||| Klara walks away to The Sitting Room.
Dorfeus: Bongo? Why, I knew him way back when!
Principalpoop: When?
Dorfeus: He's still getting played? He was always a bit thick...
Principalpoop: never give a sucker an even break
Principalpoop: wc fields forever, living is easy with eyes closed
Dorfeus: there's one getting broke every minute...
||||||||| Klara climbs in through the window at the ungodly hour of 12:19 AM
Dorfeus: I'm waiting for the electrocution...
Principalpoop: it is late, where is that bus? night all, super news about new show, thanks phil, good luck all
Dorfeus: Or someone like a hymn...
||||||||| Principalpoop departs at 12:20 AM, singing "Toad away, toad away; toad away, toad away! Where do you go when you're toad away?"
CS: trying to stop electrons is a job for The Electrician
Dorfeus: No wonder they're so emergized!
Woody 1: On a closing and different subject: Daniel Day Lewis is a wonderful and supernatural actor, Saw Lincoln finally, and his performance was surreal. He's amazing.
Dorfeus: I'll bet he charges through the nose!
CS: hand me the lincoln logs
Dorfeus: I haven't seen Lincoln yet. I lost his address when he was at Gettysburg...
Woody 1: His performance was so good, it's scary.
CS: who would play Peter Bergman in a movie about his life?
Dorfeus: He was a great president... couldn't dance worth a lick, though...
Woody 1: That would be a casting. Don't know.
Dorfeus: Rob Lowe?
Woody 1: Snicker on that one, Dorfeus. I like Rob.
Dorfeus: Yes...
Dorfeus: I love Snickers... my fave candy bar
Woody 1: Who in the hell could play Peter?
Dorfeus: So... which one of you is really you?
CS: Lily
CS: She told me when they tried to, they could be identical
Dorfeus: and who might all the others be, then?
Dorfeus: hmmm... 'identical'... I had to look up the word because they all just started looking the same to me...
Dorfeus: but the answers kept alluding me.
Woody 1: Perhaps John Turturro?
Dorfeus: And, what's a metaphor for? Metaphiers, metaphrands... I felt like Julian Jaynes was talking to me but all I could hear were voices in my head...
Woody 1: He played a hell of a Howard Cosell.
Dorfeus: Barton! Yes...
Woody 1: Fink? What a strange movie.
||||||||| "Hey Buck again!" ... Buck again turns, and sees Bradshaw approching with the handcuffs, and is dragged away, screaming "it's only 12:36 AM, I don't have to go yet!"...
Dorfeus: I'm witnessing history! By that I mean everything's moving so slowly...
Dorfeus: Yes, it was a strange movie...
CS: that it moves at all is a matter of perception
Dorfeus: then, perception precedes conception?
CS: you want to be on a chat radio show?
Dorfeus: which proves that existence can not precede deception!
CS: shuns precede shins
||||||||| It's 12:40 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Paustin - dead from The Plague
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
CS: is this what we're supposed to sound like on radio chat?
Dorfeus: I don't hear a thing...
CS: this isn't the firesign theatre, but at least we can talk about them
Dorfeus: But what does it mean... and why?
Klara: Catherwood, serve me some segma butter on toast
||||||||| Catherwood gives Klara some segma butter on toast.
CS: its a matter of personal opinion
Dorfeus: Oh, thank god! I thought you said something else...
Dorfeus: And that would given everything away! And you know we can't afford that!
CS: this is an opportunity for anyone who has enjoyed the firesign works and feels inspired
Klara: Catherwood, hit dorfeus in a most inappropriate fashion
||||||||| Catherwood walks up to Klara and inquires "Typing my name just to rile me, eh?"
Klara: oh, shame, doesn't work
Klara: I thought I could get him to do my dirty work
Dorfeus: Like booby sox with a dinner jacket?
Klara: sure thing
Dorfeus: Your dirty work is all cleaned up now, Klara!
Klara: I missed a few spots
Dorfeus: Just pay the bill by signing here... and here... and here.... and here...
Dorfeus: Oh, the dogs won't notice
Dorfeus: I miss them when they're gone as well...
Woody 1: Shit. I was getting ready to leave Phil an extensive message. Just realized he left the room. Shit. G'night, yall, Not that you all are nothing to me, but I gotta get to bed. It's been good.
Dorfeus: How nice of you to notice
Dorfeus: Sounds like existentialistic angst to me. Nothingness. The Abyss.
CS: a hole is a whole
Dorfeus: Why, I'm nothing but a bag of...
Woody 1: ping...ping....ping....ping..
Klara: pew pew pew pew
Dorfeus: PONG!
CS: into darkness we fly
Dorfeus: The shoe drops...
CS: ad oooo
||||||||| CS rushes off, saying "12:49 AM? Mark Time is almost on! Where's a radio?"
Klara: all that and a bag of chips, dorfeus
Dorfeus: to be cradled in the arms of Morpheus?
||||||||| "12:49 AM? I'm late!" exclaims Woody 1, who then hurries out through the french doors and down through the garden.
Dorfeus: I'll just have the chips, if you don't mind, Klara. All that gives me gas..
Klara: that's fine
Klara: a bit self serving, but who am I to talk
Klara: I'm a plantation owner, after all
Dorfeus: I hate fines... I can never buy my own chips cuz I never have ant money...
Dorfeus: any
Dorfeus: and I'm merely a planetr's wort...
Dorfeus: my spelling is betraying me!
Klara: god is dead so who to serve but the self
Klara: it's like when your eyelashes get stuck in your eyes
Dorfeus: Perhaps he's only sleeping.
Klara: they were placed there to protect me...
Klara: betrayed...
Dorfeus: My eyelashe will never get stuck in your eyes, Klara!
Klara: well you're just not close enough
Dorfeus: even if they go batty...
Dorfeus: Well, not close enough for horse shoes, anyway
Klara: should have said BB guns
Klara: YOU'LL SHOOT UR EYE OUT
Dorfeus: That would be a bad thing. Blinded by non-love... a travesty!
Klara: when your hearts on fire, you must realize, smoke gets in your eyes
Klara: and your ears, nose, mouth, lungs
Klara: you die
Dorfeus: Sounds like reflux...
Dorfeus: redux
Dorfeus: And so it proves yet again... what does not kill you only serves to make you crazier...
||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 1 O'CLOCK", then silently exits.
Klara: time is an illusion, catherwood
||||||||| Catherwood says "It's 1:00 AM"
Klara: I know, I know, you're missing the point
Dorfeus: and so we all must leave and join our soul to other endeavors, Miss Klara.
Dorfeus: I leave you in possession of the chat room... talking to yourseld... like an idiot...
Dorfeus: yourself
Klara: thanks
Dorfeus: ot pewrhaps it is I who am thus plagued!
Klara: I will do a good job
Dorfeus: my typing is going downhill fast
Dorfeus: Into thy hands I commit my typewriter...
Klara: would you like to add me on facebook, stranger with whom I am intrusting?
Dorfeus: sure
Dorfeus: but who are you, really?
Klara: Klara Strom
Klara: or so I've been lead to believe
Dorfeus: Doth I pull down the mask to reveal my strange, nay my stranger, nay- strangest face?
Dorfeus: My name is Maurice Newport
Klara: I see
Klara: from Arizona
Klara: https://www.facebook.com/Nottlenewts
Klara: that's easier
Dorfeus: Yes...
Klara: add me, if you are so inclined
Dorfeus: I just sent you the invitation. Be home by midnight...
Klara: got it
Dorfeus: So, do you write?
Dorfeus: How familiar are you with Firesign Theater?
Klara: not very, to be honest
Klara: I grew up around it, with my father
Klara: I have some old tapes, records. Main Nick Danger
Klara: but nothing near to their full collection
Dorfeus: Interesting.
Klara: I'm younger than most fans, as you can tell
Klara: *mainly
Dorfeus: I'm mainly familiar with their first 5 or 10 albums...
Dorfeus: Yes...
Dorfeus: I wasn't sure how many of them were chatting tonight
Dorfeus: You just never know...
Dorfeus: I first heard them in college...
Klara: neat
Dorfeus: and they influenced my sense of humor
Klara: I used to own an almost full collection of the goon show
Klara: if you're familiar
Dorfeus: Peter Sellers had a goon show in the UK earlier
Dorfeus: It must be homage to that, I'm thinking
Dorfeus: are you familiar with Peter Sellers?
Klara: yes
Klara: yes I am
Dorfeus: He was a genius...
Klara: if you look through my facebook cover photos, you would see that
Dorfeus: I haven't looked yet
Klara: it's my favorite scene from "the party"
Klara: not his best works, granted
Dorfeus: Yes. I've not seen everything he's done, but I love what I've seen
Klara: this conversation has gone far too conforming
Dorfeus: There's a youtube video of him doing a bunch of British accents. Brilliant work.
Klara: I've seen it
Dorfeus: Good night, Klara
Klara: goodnight
||||||||| It's 1:40 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| Klara - dead from dengue fever
||||||||| Dorfeus - dead from The Plague
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 2 O'CLOCK", then silently exits.
||||||||| It's 2:10 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| uhClem - dead from dengue fever
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
||||||||| peepsalot enters at 4:01 AM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and scurries off to the Hat Pack Annex.
||||||||| It's 4:25 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did:
||||||||| peepsalot - dead from measles
||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress...
||||||||| Catherwood enters, and announces to all and sundry "It's 4:32 AM, time to change the log file and clean out unused rooms; please exit the chat room for a minute or two. Thank you for your patience."

The Evening's Participants:
Beet
Bob Rapid
bottles
Buck
Bunnyboy
CS
Dexter Fong
DJTween
Dorfeus
Elayne
Paustin
Gargi
Garo
Gentleman_Rook
George Leroy
Happy Harry Cox
Harpster
Hawkmoth
hmmm clem
Klara
kpnanny
Mad Mike
Merlyn
MKBorders
Pat Hat
Porcelain
Principalpoop
Rufus_T_Firetween
Scooterpoot
shoes for the dead
ThisIsNino
wavy
Woody 1

URL References:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Everything_You_Know_Is_Wrong
https://firesigntheatrelegacy.com/funway.html
https://firesigntheatrelegacy.com/lilyfund/
https://firesigntheatrelegacy.com/media/media.php?item=eykiw
http://laughstore.stores.yahoo.net/firtheatseze.html
http://listen.ehhh.us:8000/tweeny16k.m3u
http://listen.ehhh.us:8000/tweeny.m3u
http://moniqueishikawa.com/nihongo/index.htm
https://www.facebook.com/Nottlenewts
www.dishnuts.net
http://www.mchawking.com
http://www.seemreal.com/nealamid/index.htm
http://youtu.be/SAPsQRU_WIA