||||||||| Catherwood re-enters the Waiting Room and explains "This is the main discussion room which is logged each night." ||||||||| Catherwood announces, "The time is 4:33 AM - I now declare Thursday's chat log for August 21, 2003 officially open!"... and then, he retires back to the vestibule... ||||||||| Catherwood strides in with a trumpet, plays a fanfare, and proclaims "Nine PM on Thursday, August 21, 2003 - I now declare alt.comedy.firesgn-thtre's chat officially open!" -- then he looks around at the empty room, looks at his watch, and mumbles "...am I early?" ||||||||| Catherwood strides up and snorts derisively "Presenting 'Merlyn LeRoy', just granted probation at 9:02 PM", then leaves hurriedly. Merlyn LeRoy: Sorry I'm late, I was in prison. ||||||||| Catherwood leads llanwydd inside, makes a note of the time (9:04 PM), then fades off into the distance going on about the waiting room or the sitting room or something. Merlyn LeRoy: hey ll llanwydd: I'll just have some tea if you don't mind Merlyn LeRoy: ga hed llanwydd: nobody would even think of coming here before 9 llanwydd: bad form ||||||||| Outside, the 9:07 PM downtown bus from Funfun Town pulls away, leaving Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes. Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: as do I llanwydd: not again! Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: Always Merlyn LeRoy: look, I go to all the trouble to allow bizarre characters like ¥åmämátø, and then you don't use them Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: sorry Merlyn LeRoy: not to be too diacritical... llanwydd: I think Yamamate is Paraguayan or Argentine or something Merlyn LeRoy: or a japanese admiral Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: Or something ||||||||| Outside, the 9:11 PM downtown bus from Funfun Town pulls away, leaving Elayne coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes. Elayne: *cough cough* Merlyn LeRoy: or a battleship Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: oi Elayne: Evenin' all! ||||||||| Catherwood strides up and snorts derisively "Presenting 'Dead Fred', just granted probation at 9:12 PM", then leaves hurriedly.
Elayne is multi-tasking, beefing up her Amazon wish list based on Robin's new "wants." Merlyn LeRoy: hey E, DF llanwydd: hi elayne Elayne: Hey Fred! Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: Oi Phred Dead Fred: High gang? llanwydd: So Fred's still alive Merlyn LeRoy: 6,000 feet above sea level Merlyn LeRoy: that's 3000 people Dead Fred: is he oh oh he's been trying to kill me llanwydd: ...et's talk about yer car llanwydd: you won't believe me when I tell you... Dead Fred: it's a funny car she drives Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: It's screaming, Wash me please ||||||||| "9:15 PM? 9:15 PM!!" says Catherwood, "Mr. Motion should be here by now...oh, THERE you are!" as Mr. Motion enters and sits on the couch. Mr. Motion: Motion is here, people have no fear! Elayne: Hey Mr. Motion! Mr. Motion: Hay E! Dead Fred: I fear loco motion llanwydd: master of amazination Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: oiio Elayne: I second that E, Motion. Mr. Motion: My own process Ilanwydd llanwydd: multiple rebendables Mr. Motion: M R's ||||||||| Dave sneaks in around 9:17 PM, trying to avoid Catherwood because of last week's "unpleasant incident." Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: dave llanwydd: Hey Dave Dave: yeah well... Merlyn LeRoy: hey mr m, dave Mr. Motion: Dave's knot here! Elayne: Hello Dave! Mr. Motion: Mer how ya bend? Dave: yes he is
Dave proceeds across the room with his cane rapidly moving for no particular reason llanwydd: Mr. Motion, is your name also Dave? Mr. Motion: Ah nope, some call me Tim the enchanter! Dead Fred: I'm busy stereo typing,left keyboard for nouns right for verbs llanwydd: Thought you might be someone I knew Elayne: Ow, you hit me with your rapidly-moving cane Dave: Fred what about the versitile words, like um... llanwydd: but i huess not
Elayne is extremely accident-prone this week. Mr. Motion: Deaad Fred are you any kin to Dead Bob? Dave: sorry E, tends to move too quickly for my knowing, free of charge though Dead Fred: as a matter of fact yes Mr. Motion: Kewl DF Bobs my hero! Dead Fred: Bob was my old man and yes he's dead Mr. Motion: If he now a puppet at festivals? Dead Fred: Bob's god to some Mr. Motion: er Is Dave: bob? Dead Fred: I'm bobbing now what? Elayne: That's okay, Dave, I just stubbed my toe (in real life). Elayne: I'm really not doing well this week. :) Mr. Motion: Ouch E! Elayne: Ouchie indeed. Dead Fred: more E Elayne: The back of my left hand is a lovely shade of purple from a bruise I got earlier this week. Elayne: I was trying to move out of the way of somebody in a narrow aisle at a local deli. Elayne: No good deed goes unpunished. Dead Fred: from whos face? Elayne: It raised a welt the size of a golf ball. I kept saying "cool!" as I put ice over it. llanwydd: how many Yamamotos are going to show up tonight? Mr. Motion: Anybody seen Mr. Muckle? Elayne: Because of course the ice was cool. Dead Fred: it's a big family Dave: damn E, it's ok, I'm the most stable on my feet out of the syblings, both are prone to falling down or up stairs, something of which is a rarity Dead Fred: you fell right over? Merlyn LeRoy: it could be a yamamoto photo finish Dave: rarity for me that is, and Ken hasn't shown up, odd Mr. Motion: He's no fun he fell right over! Dead Fred: did you say that on the... llanwydd: ...he fer lite oval Dead Fred: my suggestion unconsious village Dave: LET'S STAND HIM ON HIS HEAD Mr. Motion: Lazers leg in the air? llanwydd: now its's morning Dead Fred: with crome fend her dents Dead Fred: they're not the cutest dents but they masticate llanwydd: dental meditation? Mr. Motion: I got caught Masicating as a child! Dead Fred: dental mediation Dead Fred: stop biting your sister Mr. Motion: and finish you homework? llanwydd: you seem to have ended the conversation Dead Fred: was there a con verse ation Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: That was fast Mr. Motion: Moi? Dead Fred: that was your life Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: Bummer Dead Fred: was watching a you bet your life video I have Grocho had the timing Dave: you bet your life, hmmm... Dead Fred: don't everyone speak at once it get's con fussing Mr. Motion: Hmmmm pizza heap good Kemosabe llanwydd: So where is everbody from? Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto: Here Dead Fred: there llanwydd: I live in the north part of New York state Merlyn LeRoy: Hey, the old Rhino Records gang reformed as "shout factory", and they're releasing new You Bet Your Life episodes on DVD: http://www.shoutfactory.com/ Mr. Motion: I don't exist I'm just a figment of your imagination! Dead Fred: COOL Dave: pizza, I like anchovies though, wonder why people don't, but I like salt a lot, gotta have my 2000 MGs of sodium every day Merlyn LeRoy: "new" as in "old, but not available before" Mr. Motion: Have you tried Rocky Rococo's anchovie eyes? Dead Fred: Shadows and light was the first thing I saw. That was one hot band. thanks Mel llanwydd: a small flat thing with eyes ||||||||| Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto rushes off, saying "9:37 PM? Mark Time is almost on! Where's a radio?" Dead Fred: Shadows and light was the first thing I saw. That was one hot band. thanks Mel Elayne: Sausages with eyes? Mr. Motion: I like a nice Ma rainy Mole skin cockie myself. Eat'm, wipe'em off and eat'em again! Yum yum! llanwydd: So where's everybody from, or do we know Merlyn LeRoy: And here's an old Coca-Cola ad with a swastika motif: http://www.heathenworld.com/swastika/coke.html ||||||||| Outside, the 9:39 PM downtown bus from Funfun Town pulls away, leaving ah,clem coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes. llanwydd: howdy clem ah,clem: hello Dear friends, Merlyn LeRoy: hey ah, clem Mr. Motion: Merl they're still using swastikas in China! ah,clem: very tired, but poped in to say hi to all, Elayne: I'm from Blackout Land! Mr. Motion: Hi ah, clem? Elayne: Hey ah clem! Merlyn LeRoy: yep: http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_775737.html Merlyn LeRoy: now the choice is new coke, old coke, or nazi coke Merlyn LeRoy: "have a coke and a heil" Mr. Motion: Il in answer to your many questions suburban Detroit Elayne: It's the really, really white Coke. ||||||||| Ham and Eggs Yamamoto waltzes in at 9:41 PM carrying an obsidian door knocker. ah,clem: sniff sniff Merlyn LeRoy: cherry aryan coke Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: mmmm Dead Fred: hey are those green eggs? ah,clem: more sugar Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: you bet Merlyn LeRoy: ham and organ Merlyn LeRoy: just like in theatres Elayne: I know NOTHING about green eggs, NOTHING! I was only following customers' ORDERS! Mr. Motion: Ah the glory of food! MOre Sugar Foundation ah, clem? Dead Fred: oooh but I ate them sam I am Merlyn LeRoy: awright, lt. schwarz and egger ||||||||| Dr. Headphones enters at 9:43 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and runs off to the Haberdashery Barn. Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: That's a wurlitzer organ ah,clem: Merlyn Leroy at his organ again.... Merlyn LeRoy: I've been caught masticating ah,clem: hi Ken Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: If you don't stop it you'll go blind Merlyn LeRoy: don't let dave see you hear that ah,clem: just don't chew Dave: hey there Ken Dr. Headphones: hello, dear friends Merlyn LeRoy: hey 'phonez Mr. Motion: Hi Dr. H? Dead Fred: hey doc Dave: hey, to the group assembled at large, or small depending, but I need musical advice...again Elayne: Hey Ken! Merlyn LeRoy: AAAaaaa ah,clem: da fa,, da da Dr. Headphones: ah, clem: i got linux problems, can we meet in private, another room, perhaps? Merlyn LeRoy: that's the usual punchline to "give me an A" Dead Fred: do do do Merlyn LeRoy: use the kennels, the other rooms do funny stuff to your text Dead Fred: done done done Dr. Headphones: merl: what room do you suggest for a tek-tawk? Dr. Headphones: thank you, anticipated my question Merlyn LeRoy: I actually read your mind; nino's been giving me lessons Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: good reading? Merlyn LeRoy: kinda like TV Guide, actually Dead Fred: riding the reading Dr. Headphones: if you're reading my mind, you must have at least a 2nd grade edjikashun Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Like anne coulter Dr. Headphones: yam: no cursing, please! coulter is a naughty word in my vocabulary Merlyn LeRoy: I hear she's starting a peppy music group "Up With Blacklisting" Dr. Headphones: ah, clem/jim: are you listening/reading? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: I read her mind, too two seconds and I had time for coffee Mr. Motion: It's not nice to make fun of the mentally handicapped Ham! Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: It is if they're brownshirts Merlyn LeRoy: a mentally handicapped ham? Merlyn LeRoy: oh, reagan Dave: hey, I'm debating whether to get the Anthology of Paul Butterfield, I figured this would be the place to ask if it was a worthy purchase Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Anne Coulter in a vcan Dead Fred: Yes buy it Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Is reagan dead yet? ah,clem: getting sleeply, but, yes Ken, it you can wait for me to notice, I can make an irc room. irc.equnet.org #linux Dr. Headphones: dave, not much advice from me, i know only the name, not the work Mr. Motion: I ccan't tell you what Annh is as long as there is a lady present! Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Dave, buy it Merlyn LeRoy: clem, you can just move to the kennels using the pulldown menu Dr. Headphones: clem: we can just adjourn to the kennels here, select it from the "send to all" window ||||||||| Dr. Headphones, spotting Bradshaw, runs into The Kennels. llanwydd: What's the Paul anthology? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Puttin on the dog, eh? ||||||||| ah,clem, spotting Bradshaw, runs into The Kennels. Mr. Motion: He must be ham they named a carrier after him. The USS Dementia!
Ham and Eggs Yamamoto put on a dog once, it was ill fitting and moved too much Dave: yam you have this one? I just need opinions, that's all Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Physically, I meant Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Not handy Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: But I would go for it ||||||||| 9:55 PM -- ah,clem enters.(Entry from Nick Danger's "Idiots I Have Been Paid To Follow"). llanwydd: testing Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: You fassed Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: gassed ah,clem: just lurking, talking to Dr. headphones... Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: what a gas you passed Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Aha Merlyn LeRoy: ok, but if you're not in the kennels, you can't hear him. Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: what? Mr. Motion: Squeeze him again and maybe he'll pass another one? ah,clem: using irc Merl Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: ort not Merlyn LeRoy: oh Dave: he's in two places, ooooooo, aaaaaaaaaa Dead Fred: take the banana out of your ears and you can hear him. see Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: I'm always in two places Merlyn LeRoy: I can't place you Dead Fred: place me place me Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: My guidence concillor said that ||||||||| "I'm going to The Kennels" says ah,clem, and leaves. llanwydd: Anybody hear Firesign on the radio lately? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: not I ||||||||| Dr. Headphones walks in and says "It's 9:58 PM, has anybody seen Nancy?" Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: But I don't do NPR Merlyn LeRoy: I heard the web program, but that's old stuff Dead Fred: I listened to 3 days of AM radio and survived ||||||||| Catherwood strides up and snorts derisively "Presenting 'Saskacat', just granted probation at 9:59 PM", then leaves hurriedly. Saskacat: greetings from saskatoon Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: We actually have AM stations that play music here, fancy that Dead Fred: howdy Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: oi ||||||||| It's 10:00 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| Dr. Headphones - dead from The Plague ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... Dead Fred: running back to Elayne: Hi Cat! What are you doing in Sask? Saskacat: gain one, lose one Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: The plauge is suitably icky Saskacat: el, we're here making a flick Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: He's a Nazi hunter ||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 10 O'CLOCK", then silently exits. Elayne: Wow, sounds exciting! Can you tell us about it or is it still a secret? Dead Fred: dose he wear a bagel for protection Saskacat: was counting on deep blue skies but they're all grey cuz of the forest fires back in BC, several hours away by jet Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: What's to film in Sask? : how did dr. headphones die of the plague? ||||||||| Dr. Headphones sneaks in around 10:01 PM, trying to avoid Catherwood because of last week's "unpleasant incident." Merlyn LeRoy: must be my buggy reaper again Dr. Headphones: i came back, just didn't say anything Saskacat: it's called Little Wings and it's about the first time I hitch hiked, which was in August, 1970, when I was a student at the University in this very city. did some filming at the campus this morning Merlyn LeRoy: who asked "how did dr. headphones die of the plague?" ? Elayne: A straight docu? Saskacat: i may die of the west nile plague. the flies are everywhere, but thankfully no mosquito bites YET Elayne: Or fictionalized autobiography? Dr. Headphones: merl: i asked, but i guess i wasn't really there? Saskacat: no, its in the way of a children's story-fairy tale kinda thing Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Winnie the Pooh? Merlyn LeRoy: right, I thought it was you, but your second-person phrasing confused me Saskacat: its the next generation of evolution for Seem Real Theatre Merlyn LeRoy: I think you got reaped because you left the room and the reaper thought you hadn't done anything for too long somehow Dr. Headphones: ahem, i think that's 3rd person phrasing. i learned it from bob dole Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Second Story man llanwydd: Midge, Midge, Midge, Midge, Midge is that you? Dead Fred: Ure Saskacat: lots of reaping going on in sask rightnow Elayne: That sounds so neat, Cat! Elayne: Not the reaping, the fairy-tale thingie... Saskacat: i think you'll enjoy it, el, i know I will Dr. Headphones: the reaper has no idea what i do when i leave the room. if he had a hidden camera, he'd learn all sorts of goodies about me ;) Saskacat: i'm just glad this hotel has a computer they'll let me use, if only for half an hour Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Are they reaping what they sew? Dr. Headphones: cat: they ration their computer time to guests? Dead Fred: reaping what they sue? Saskacat: yep Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: only in the US Saskacat: have i missed any firesign news? Dr. Headphones: no, the terrible news drought continues..... Dead Fred: sask usa did I miss an invation Merlyn LeRoy: In October, I'll be in London for one thursday; I'll try to make the chat, or at least write something during that day Dead Fred: the beagles have landed Dr. Headphones: i think ah, clem fell asleep. went to kennel, he suggested meeting on irc, he pinged out Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Who gave snoopy a pilot's licence? Dr. Headphones: the red baron was in on that, yam Mr. Motion: It's that time again. Mr. Birdseed Go To Press! G'nite Y'all! Saskacat: it was good to hear him play Dear friends 6 last weekend Mr. Motion:http://issuesandalibis.org Dr. Headphones: later, ernie Saskacat: i wonder why he or fran never announce their shows on alt.comedy.firesign Mr. Motion: Late Doc. ||||||||| Mr. Motion runs out the back door as Mayor P'nisnose blasts through the front door holding a shotgun and shouting "Where's Mr. Motion?! It's 10:09 PM and my ballot boxes haven't been stuffed yet!" Saskacat: by mr. motion. have no fear Merlyn LeRoy: they put a msg in the mindless fellowship pavilion, and I sent out a msg to the email list ||||||||| It's 10:10 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| ah,clem - dead from jaundice ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... Saskacat: good work, merl Dead Fred: oooh jaundice that stinks Dr. Headphones: mr. motion turned yellow on us ||||||||| A time machine materializes at 10:11 PM and Mudhead steps out, carrying a grape from ancient Greece. Saskacat: hi mud Mudhead: That damm Catherwood Mudhead: Hi All Dr. Headphones: hi mud Merlyn LeRoy: ah nuts, clem shouldn't have been reaped, either. ||||||||| ah,clem has arrived at the appointed hour of 10:12 PM. Dr. Headphones: clem fell asleep, i think Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: oi Mud Dr. Headphones: he's back! ah,clem: dialup dot me, Dr. Headphones: he fell asleep on irc and got reaped, er, pinged Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: He was doin it w/the dawgs Mudhead: I fell asleep today and the ambulance showed up! Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: That's scary Saskacat: hi ah. good to hear dear friends on your show last week. are you going to play let's eat next? Merlyn LeRoy: but he still shouldn't have gotten reaped, he was still refreshing a page Mudhead: Woke up with a medic lookin at me Merlyn LeRoy: also, I think it didn't remove his name from the list.. oh well, my problem llanwydd: where can I get some of those tapes? Mudhead: Scoth? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Scotch? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: ha! Mudhead: Scotch? Saskacat: you can record ah clem's show off the computer-radio, llan Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Just hook the Wire recorder up in the back Dead Fred: meanwhile... Mudhead: Beat me to the Scotch will ya llanwydd: well, I can try. Do you know if it's possible to do it with webtv? Dave: damn I keep missing the broadcasts, always doing other shit Dead Fred: don't bite your sister Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: What is w/all this dental imagery?
Ham and Eggs Yamamoto hats dentistes Mudhead: Thats 69cent bar scotch Saskacat: if they dont chew, their teeth grow through their brains
Ham and Eggs Yamamoto bets Osama woulda been a dentist Dr. Headphones: it ain't 12 year old single malt at that price! Dead Fred: he was bi molar Merlyn LeRoy: sex and the single malt Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: No, it's been married 7 times before Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: and every one was a Henery Dead Fred: never was a willy perish the thought
Ham and Eggs Yamamoto trades a molar of 69 cent bar scotch for 3 beakers of Chemicals Merlyn LeRoy: Married Mr. O'Meal, didn't she? Saskacat: groundskeeper willy? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Happy O'Meal, the town drunk llanwydd: that's fair trade! Dead Fred: willy the worthog ||||||||| It's 10:20 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| ah,clem - dead from The Plague ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... Dead Fred: he's dead again Elayne: I was almost dead, but I got better. Saskacat: good to hear, el Elayne: Sorry, away from keyboard for awhile. Dead Fred: not me Merlyn LeRoy: the reaper man will get you Mudhead: Hi Elayne Saskacat: i've been enjoying your blog, when i'm in vancouver Elayne: Oh, hi Mudhead! Elayne: Thanks Cat! I think I need to add more Canadian Content, though... Mudhead: Long tyme no type Merlyn LeRoy: I think I know a big part of the problem... : reap this Saskacat: i'm not all that content, but i'll do what i can Elayne: Everyone's already talked about the "US will never take the blame" remark, so I'll need something else. Dr. Headphones: looks like ah, clem had a comment for you :) ||||||||| Outside, the 10:22 PM downtown bus from Funfun Town pulls away, leaving Bubbas A Bum coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes. Elayne: Indeed, Mudhead. Thrilled to see you again! Dead Fred: Well houses to haunt have a great evening all I must be off Mudhead: Is it true you can do weed in Canada Bubbas A Bum: Hallelujah, I'm a Bum! Saskacat: i can do weed anywhere. i'ts highly portable Mudhead: but is it legal? Dr. Headphones: hey bubba Bubbas A Bum: Hey, all Saskacat: unfortunately, in saskatchewan, it is only weeds, unlike my beauteous BC Elayne: Ah, I return and everyone starts leaving... Elayne: Must be because I bogarted... Mudhead: not I dear Saskacat: court in ontario said yes. courts in 2 other provinces agreeed. in BC they just stopped charring anyone a few years ago. feds keep trying to recriminalize but they may not succeed Dr. Headphones: elayne, i'm not going anywhere. it's raining here and i want to stay inside Bubbas A Bum: I'm not leaving, I just c-c-c-c-came! Mudhead: Seriously Cat, is marijuana legal now in Canada? Saskacat: alas, my 30 minutes of infamy are up. Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: All libs are going to Canada to smoke dope Elayne: It's decrim, right?, which is slightly different than being legal. Saskacat: mudhead, some courts say yes, some no. Mudhead: But for medicinal use? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Snakebite Medicine Elayne: I dunno, if I were going to another country just to smoke dope I'd probably opt for the Netherlands. Mudhead: i'd nreed brownies Mudhead: i cant fly Saskacat: suprme court supposed to make final decision at the end of the year. then the govt can write new law or just let the legalization (NOT decriminalization) stand, if they can stand up to GW Bush Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Browwnies are a tasty treat. Melts in yr mind not in yr hand Elayne: Ah, sorry Cat, I did think it was decrim. I should pay closer attention. :) See, this is why my blog needs more Canadian Content. Saskacat: i'm being ejected from the computer by yet another paying guest. see you all next weed, er, week Dr. Headphones: gw is out to rule the world Mudhead: i'm told u could make oil from weed and mix with food Elayne: Everybody wants to rule the world. Bubbas A Bum: You can't fly, MH? Try the brownies. Elayne: Bye Cat! Mudhead: next week cat ciao Bubbas A Bum: Bye, Cat. Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: by cat Merlyn LeRoy: bye cat Dr. Headphones: later, kitty cat Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: BUY! Cat! Mudhead: Lung problems Bubba, sorry but i'm bummed Merlyn LeRoy: I think I've fixed the reaper; it was actually changing rooms that confused things if your name had a space or a non-ascii character Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: not good Merlyn LeRoy: or anything that rawurlencode needed to munge Bubbas A Bum: Hey, can't have too many bums here! Mudhead: if we all go over there quickly -----> Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Mud COPD? Mudhead: We'd have a bums rush Dr. Headphones: LAPD?
Ham and Eggs Yamamoto hopes to hell not Mudhead: yeah, Ham Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Mark Furman? Bubbas A Bum: As of Tuesday, I officially became a bum. Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Aw jesus, sorry Elayne: I think I'll be moseying as well. See you next week, folks! Mudhead: Asbestosis from submarine building Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Thank you, US govt! ||||||||| Elayne departs at 10:29 PM, singing "Toad away, toad away; toad away, toad away! Where do you go when you're toad away?" Dr. Headphones: g'nite, e Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: BUY! Elaine? ||||||||| It's 10:30 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| Dead Fred - dead from the yaws ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... Bubbas A Bum: TTFN, E Mudhead: I'm due new lungs, i'm officially on list ||||||||| Catherwood escorts Dexter Fong in through the front door at 10:30 PM, picks up his cues (only slightly scorched), and heads for the billiard room. Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: That works fairly well, but don't get the chinese models Dexter Fong: Where did dexter go when the lights went off Mudhead: i'm not eating well,thought weed might help Merlyn LeRoy: probably won't hurt Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Seriously, I know a guy who got new lungs and it really improved his quality of life Bubbas A Bum: Iron? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: You need to eat Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Lung transplant Dexter Fong: But what kind of chicks did he attract Yam? Dr. Headphones: hi dex Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: oi DF Dexter Fong: Hiya Kend^ Dexter Fong: and Oi back to you MY Dr. Headphones: i see you survived the great blechout of '03 Mudhead: Yam it worked ? Bubbas A Bum: bleachout? Dexter Fong: I coulda done it with my eyes closed Ken Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: I did some tank hauling that night Dr. Headphones: yeah, bubba, dex is a blonde now Dexter Fong: And I'm having a lot more fun ||||||||| 10:34 PM: klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg jumps out of the hall closet saying "I've been listening to all of you talking about me for the past hour!" Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Whatta Bombshell! Bubbas A Bum: blonde on bloned? Dexter Fong: Hey Klok Dr. Headphones: the tv news led me to believe that i dnd't have power either, but it didn't get this far west Dr. Headphones: hi klok Dexter Fong: Hiya Bubba klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: evenin' Dexter Fong: and Merl and Cat and Mud Bubbas A Bum: Hey, dex klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: power has been lost again? Acme must be behind this! Dave: brb for a bit, gonna do some researching ||||||||| Dave leaves to catch the 10:35 PM train to Hellmouth. Dr. Headphones: well, klok, i clobbered my mandrake! who says you can't crash linux Dexter Fong: Acme = American Canned Metal Extrusion klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: i crashed Red Hat once Dexter Fong: I crashed into a red cap once at the train station Dr. Headphones: i overran my disk space and when i tried to expand it, i can't log in now Bubbas A Bum: Crashed Red Hat... but that's one of the fanciest restaurants..... Dexter Fong: And there's luggage all over the highway in Mystic Conn> klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: yes, but watch out for the Red Shirt Pashtuns! Dexter Fong: Red Shirt Pashtuns; they can't kill until next season klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: you used partition magic or the Low Priced Spread? Dr. Headphones: bubba: do you mean brown derby? Dr. Headphones: klok: i have driveworks, same general thing as partition magic klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: yep, margarine is the same general thing as butter... ;-) Dexter Fong: Merl: Has the latest series of worms, viruses etc. bothered you at all? Bubbas A Bum: Partician Magic? Dexter Fong: Patrician Magic klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: no, by the price, Patrician Magic Bubbas A Bum: I got blasted! Merlyn LeRoy: not at home, I have a mac Bubbas A Bum: (and I got a virus too) Dr. Headphones: guys, i am in a storm here, and roof started leaking. i'm bye-bye for now klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: it's only called Partition Magic in the Raj Merlyn LeRoy: some virus updates at work (lockheed martin) ||||||||| Dr. Headphones rushes off, saying "10:39 PM? Mark Time is almost on! Where's a radio?" Merlyn LeRoy: bye phones Dexter Fong: Nght Ken, stay above the high water mark
klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg is listening to Skunk Works at the moment, Meryl Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: If you spork up Linux or NT there is something you can do Dexter Fong: sprok? Dexter Fong: spork? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto:http://trinityhome.org/trk/ klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: the guy on Star Trek? Dexter Fong: Spork = Synthetic Pork Dexter Fong: The other other white meat Bubbas A Bum: That explains the vulcan handshake -- it works as a spoon and a fork! Dexter Fong: lol Bubba klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: ham -- or use the Knoppix CD Bubbas A Bum: Thank you, thank you. Don't forget to tip your waitress. Dexter Fong: Gratuity Included Mudhead: Stop it! klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: is that like dwarf tossing, bubba? Mudhead: Your hurting me! Dexter Fong: Appreciation exclud3d Mudhead: Its too funny... Dexter Fong: Waitress Tipping Mudhead: spork klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: ooh, Dex doing leetspeek! Cuhl! Dexter Fong: They dress up like cows Bubbas A Bum: Only on the dance floor.... klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: and bleans? Merlyn LeRoy: they're Pushovers Dexter Fong: Doing the CowPie Boogie Mudhead: you've had enough beans boys klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: my first girlfriend used to wear pushovers Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: And Bobby Sox? Bubbas A Bum: sucha pushover..... klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: no, I think it was Jerry Castle after awhile, Ham Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Topheavy prolly Dexter Fong: Sasha Pushover, Russion Agent Mudhead: Your papers please Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: They're our friends now klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: no, it was Jerry, Ham. Topheavy was in the backfield on the football team, but wasn't all that popular Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Hairy and ugly prolly Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Palooka Joe Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: or... klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: no, he was nearly bald at 16, Ham Dexter Fong: Americas only Heavyweight Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Palooka Jesus! klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: and had a worse beard than Nixon Bubbas A Bum: Bazooka Jesus? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Needed the Noreco Lawnmower then klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: LOL Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: I'm going to stael that Dexter Fong: Noreco? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Norelco Dexter Fong: NorthAmerican Economic Organization Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Wasn't that Norwegan Electrical Company? klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: north american philips electric company to you, sir! Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: oho Dexter Fong: That's NAPEC, Klok Bubbas A Bum: Oh my god... little Bazooka Jesus comics around really bad bubble gum. I claim the copyright on the idea (if only to prevent anyone from actuallyd doing it) klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: a prolly owned subsistence of philips gloielampfabriken of eindhoven Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: It's done already Dexter Fong: Nice Klok: Can't tell the typos from the foreign speak Bubbas A Bum: Don't tell me... the watchtower folks.... Dexter Fong: Bob Dylan? klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Jimmy Hendrix? Bubbas A Bum: All along the Watchtower... we were reading these little pamphlets..... klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: those are malpropishisms, Dex Dexter Fong: Klok: They certainly are ||||||||| It's 10:50 PM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| Saskacat - dead from The Plague ||||||||| llanwydd - dead from the common cold ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: didn't Sylvia Plath write that, Bubbas? Dexter Fong: I think the "Reaper" outta be more up to date with his diseases, i.e. Sars, wEST nILE, ETC klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: so what had saskat to tell? Dexter Fong: Dunno got here late Klok Bubbas A Bum: naw.... Anne Sexton. Merlyn LeRoy: I think I took them all from diseases mentioned in Beat the Reaper, plus the Fiddlers from BDB klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: it wouldn't be in character, Dex ;-) Until the guys update the game Ham and Eggs Yamamoto:http://objective.jesussave.us/bazookajesuslarge.jpg Dexter Fong: Klok and Merl: I don't think you ought to feel bound by tradition Bubbas A Bum: Sorry, but non-html files may only be downloaded if linked to directly from the site hosting them. Please scroll all the way to the bottom of this page where you will find a link to the file you are looking for. klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: i was watching the Al. Courthouse drama tonite and thinking, there but for the grace of god go the Taliban... klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: (speaking of being bound by tradition) Dexter Fong: Don't you mean "Allah" Klok? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: ok go to http://objective.jesussave.us/index.html and look under Halloween Reclamation klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: kwd desperately calculates a way out of the box Dex has cornered him into...
Dexter Fong slips Klok a box cutter Bubbas A Bum: ugh.... water mocassins. Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: I say Zoraster, meseelf klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: well, um, al lah means "the god", just like The Economist means... Dexter Fong: And a Light goes on Bubbas A Bum: Thus Spake Yamamoto Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Bubba, the rest of the site is screamingly funny Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: I almost thought it was a joke
klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg sings softly, and we all shine on... Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Except that the links are legit
Dexter Fong bathes in the light of the silvery Harvest.... klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: that's what Nathan's and Pebble Beach, say, too, Ham Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Just confirms my theory that Comedy IS a force of nature klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Dex, if you turn off NYC again and run outside, you can bathe in the lite of...Mars! Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Zondervan is for real, so is the American tract society Dexter Fong: Klok: I don't want no more war anymore klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: yes, it is the Quantum anti-force to Gravity, Ham
Dexter Fong sets the anti-comedy engines for "off" Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: These pppl have a lot of naturally occuring Comedy atoms klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: hide on the 27th, Dex: http://ars.userfriendly.org/cartoons/?id=20030810&mode=classic Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Christ, you can;t make up shit this funny Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: bwhahahahahahaha Dexter Fong: Scotty replies,"I'm laughing as fast as I can Cap'n" klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Cap'n, the writers can't take it anymore! klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Kirk: Scotty, you know Starfleet's Prime Directive - "You can't write a wrong" Dexter Fong: Kirk responds,"That's very logical, and hence, not amusing" Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: No more UNITARIAN writers, ether! Dexter Fong: Spock interject, "That's my line you idiot" ||||||||| Catherwood enters the room, strikes a gong, and bellows "THE TIME IN NEW YORK IS 11 O'CLOCK", then silently exits. klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Or so Kirk would respond as Kirk approaches Spock as a limit Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Spork? Dexter Fong: The tribble with Sporks klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: yeah, benjamin all day spork Dexter Fong: they won't stay on your forks klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: (lonnie donnegan's unpopular follow-up to "Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Spork"
Dexter Fong goes in search of liquid dilithium crystal klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: ) Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Watch out for Andorian Meth Labs klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: one must eventually balance out all parentheses, so says The Zen of C Coding
Bubbas A Bum unties his Kangaroo. Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: They have 3 heads and 7 foot fangs klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: the Administration? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: No, they have pin heads and 1" penises klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: I thought it had three heads and seven footpads. Or, was that a Hemlock Stones mystery? klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Hell, the Administration is a Hemlock Stones mystery...
Dexter Fong returns with a Vulcan Masrtini and *three* zoftig alien chicks klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: zoftig? klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: zaftig?
Bubbas A Bum is going to move away from the screen for a while to watch "Queer Eye". Dexter Fong: Zoftig Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Achtung Chucko, not THAT one Dexter Fong: Don't let 'em touch you Bubba klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: it can see you anywhere, Bubbas; there's no getting away from it klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: it's on the back of our money now! Dexter Fong: Mr. Nickie Danger, "Queer Eye" Ham and Eggs Yamamoto:http://www.cactusgamedesign.com/board_games_bibleman.htm
klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg has always felt that our currency should have a designation of which is front and back of a bill ||||||||| Dave enters at 11:07 PM as Catherwood takes their hat and goat and runs off to the Haberdashery Barn. klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: he's back! Dexter Fong: Klok: You seemed em puzzled by the term "zoftig" Mudhead: Good Nite All Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: nite Dexter Fong: Night Mud Dave: AH HA! I sat on my pipe! Merlyn LeRoy: jest fixin' things klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: nite mudhead ||||||||| Around 11:08 PM, Mudhead walks off into the sunset... Dave: I've never listened to all of that yet, most of it though klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: I play 'way too little Scrabble, Dex Dexter Fong: Hiyah Dave Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Ha! Dave's Still here! klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: it's zaftig or nothing for me... Dexter Fong: Klok: Yiddish word meaning extraordinarily built womed: large curvaceous and voluptuos Dexter Fong: wome Dexter Fong: women Ham and Eggs Yamamoto:http://www.cactusgamedesign.com/video_angelwars_1.htm Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Goils, Dames Dexter Fong: Foils, Fames Merlyn LeRoy: the City of Bondage sounds interesting... klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: yes, Dex, but I always used "zaftig", without the o...which has a certain roundness to it Dexter Fong: Klok: I was pretty sure it was spelled with an "o" but you may be right Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: I like "Share yr Faith w/Carved Vegatables" Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: I think it is Zoftig klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: i just checked, it's spelled...both ways. ah, those yids! Dave: I'm lost Dexter Fong: Dave: Set your course for the heart of the sun klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: zaftig is the dominant, according to the American Heritage (in all its WASP glory): http://www.bartleby.com/61/13/Z0021300.html Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: bah Dexter Fong: Klok: I only accept the OED definition klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: humbug! Dexter Fong: Blatherskite Dave: the heart of the sun through interstellar space on the sun ship
klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg reaches for his OED and the bookcase tips over on him... Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Our allowing little bits of filth into our lives is just like boiling live frogs. You see, if you try dumping them into the boiling water, they will, of course, jump out. But, if you place them in cool water, and gradually turn up the heat, they will stay in the pot till they are cooked. This is how Satan gets to us. Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: We're all Satan's supper you see klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Hearts of Space? You should have heard the space music I used to generate! Dave: very cool thinking yam Dexter Fong: Klok: lol..There was a Composer, pianist named Charles Alkan who was killed when his bookcase tipped over on him Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Gas music don't count, lay off the beans Dave: I dig that show klok, I want more ambient music but don't know where to start klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Yeah, Ham - remember, if you eat a live frog in the morning, nothing worse can happen to either of you the rest of the day -- and you save on cooking fuel Dexter Fong: Ham: Ribbit! Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Hell, I don't write this, I have ppl that do it for me klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: zoftig writers, Yam? Dave: but I did buy the KLf's Chill Out, great to fall asleep to, but then I get woken up because the cd changes to something a little more loud than that album Dexter Fong: lol Dexter Fong: No Zoftig writers klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: didn't know about Alkan, Dex. It was always the brothers with the stacks and stacks of old newspapers that got to me... Dexter Fong: Klok: Yeah cant remember their names at the moment klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: that's the trouble with space music, Dave - it puts me to sleep, so I can never evaluate its actual quality Merlyn LeRoy: zäftig Bubbas A Bum: Da Bum, Da Bum, Da Bum is Back... Dexter Fong: Alkan wrote these incredibly dense long Symphonies for th e piano Dexter Fong: Jawohl Merl klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: yeah, did you hear the story on Morn. Edition today, about the German woman married to that Iraqi POW scientist who said there were no WMDs? And she was frantically going around trying to find out what happend to him and was at the UN hotel on Tuesday...? Dave: oh speaking of piano stuff, I'm debating whether to order the Complete Keyboard Music of William Byrd from the library, if they have it Dexter Fong: Klok: No I didn't...what happened? klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: like Hovaness? Dexter Fong: Al Hovaness? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Hovaness is okay klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: They didn't find her, Dex. Presumed dead. It's just so awful, and they seem to be just holding the guy so he won't talk to the press and "confuse" them. It's on the NPR website as an audio file Dexter Fong: Ho vanesses, Police puzzled klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: yeah, he reminds me of Satie, a little, but has very oriental bent, too Dexter Fong: Nothing worse than a bent oriental klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: yeah, like that movie with Angelica Huston and Jack Nickelson klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: nicholson Dexter Fong: Oriental Town? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Him and Lou Harris got a lot of Oriental influence klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Forget it Jack, it's just thailand Dexter Fong: Thai me kangaroo down, Jack Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Tied Stick? Dexter Fong: I shot the wallaby, but i did not stab the kangaroo klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: ah, Prizzi's Honor: "Yeah, let's do it. Right here on the Oriental" Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: What is w/all this MARSUPIAL imagry
Ham and Eggs Yamamoto calls in the BFMAP Dexter Fong: Hey! That's my Oriental! Dexter Fong: Cato! Get up klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: well, Mars makes its closest approach in less than a week, Ham ||||||||| Outside, the 11:25 PM downtown bus from Funfun Town pulls away, leaving Bunnyboy coughing in a cloud of diesel fumes. Bunnyboy: lo dere Dexter Fong: Hey Bun Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: You have an Institute to run! Merlyn LeRoy: hey BB Bunnyboy: L8 blumer Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: oi Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Heard you were cloned klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg:http://us.imdb.com/Quotes?0089841 Dave: yeah I miss the whole mars thing klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: evening, BB Dave: ah well Bunnyboy: Say, it took me almost 40 years to figure that the ABC song and TWINKLE TWINKLE LITTLE STAR...are the same song. klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: it's another attempt by astronomers to get attention Dave Dexter Fong: Dave: It might be cloudy anyway Bunnyboy: Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh Dexter Fong: Bun: A moment of insight? Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: Just a big light in the sky klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: every 5-7 years, Mars gets really close to Earth. As in 5% closer or something. And this time, it's maybe a half percent closer than it's been in 60,000 years. Big deal. Dexter Fong: Farmers circle their crops Dave: wait, they are? I never realized that, are you sure Bunnyboy: (sings) Bubbas A Bum, and the Butler didn't do it... klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: it don't hold a candle to the moon, for sure. I looked at it tonight klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: it's like comets- they put these pictures in the newspaper, and you think the damn thing is going to cover the sky. Dexter Fong: Candle power! The answer to the big blackout Bunnyboy: Well, better do my usual Media Addict thang... Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: I had Jupiter in my back yard. It floats in a glass of water ya know Dexter Fong: Ham: That's Juniper not Jupiter Bunnyboy: ALL THAT JAZZ is out on DVD. Picked that up, yup. Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: hot damn klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: but you end up in some dark field in the dead of night in the middle of winter freezing your ass off to look at something that has a hard time coming close to an airliner a couple miles up Dexter Fong: 23 skidoo Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: It's something foor media types to pEEb about Bunnyboy: Tamarra's pluckin's: BOWLING FOR COLUMBINE, CHICAGO and THE KID STAYS IN THE PICTURE. Bunnyboy: And, sometime this weekend, I gotta order HOW TIME FLYS. klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: and when they can't con us with that, they're trying to scare us that some wayward piece of rock out there we can't see is gonna wipe us all out tomorrow Bunnyboy: ANIMAL HOUSE, back in the digital forum Tuesday. Dexter Fong: These and other now available at Blockbusters Bunnyboy: Yeah, I tell folks I'm an M.A. *chortle*
klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg is all worked up by astronomical deceptions and must get beer Bunnyboy: Media...ADDICT! Dexter Fong: Mormon Apparition? Dave: haha klok, well watch out, there's a slight possibility that that piece of rock will hit you, not sure how slight, but slightly slight Bunnyboy: A watchdate: 10/28 Dexter Fong: Watchout!!!!! Bunnyboy: LOONEY TUNES and HOMICIDE: SEASON 3, both out. I'm saving now! Dexter Fong: BuN: Did you see the movie "A Mighty Wind"? klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: that one blew me away Dexter Fong: Klok: =))))))) Bunnyboy: Dex: Oh, yas! It's out...ehrm...next month, on video, I believe. Ham and Eggs Yamamoto: hah! Dave: I'm not really a movie person, music's more where I'm at, my goal is to get enough money to get Van Morrison's entire catalog Dave: I did want to see a mighty wind though ||||||||| At 11:34 PM, Ham and Eggs Yamamoto vanishes mysteriously -- just as Nino the Mind Boggler predicted! klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: really? including the autographed Segway? Bunnyboy: The PBS "live concert" is a extra on that disc. Music without the backstage biz. Dexter Fong: Dave: I have every Keith Jarrett Standards recording klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: or was it a Steinway? I forget Dexter Fong: Klok: It was a Dusendorfer klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Dexter -- I borrowed one of them, but got distracted by his attempts to channel Glen Gould Bunnyboy: Dave: It's rite there next to the Sears catalog...in the liddle wooden shed, with a crescent on it. Dexter Fong: Klok: Nah Dave: lucky man dex klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: You're sure it wasn't a Weimeraner era Bosendorfer, Dex? Bunnyboy: Is that Boesdorfer? Dexter Fong: Klok: It coulda been a Reichbuilder Bunnyboy: Yeah, Jarrett and Gould were/are right good groaners...and artists as well. Dexter Fong: or maybe an Auto Union Clavierstrasse klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Bun - you might be referring to the Boerdorfer, which was the Ikashia wood African version; very hard to keep tuned Dexter Fong: Klok: Yes, it kept growing klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Well, from the gyoto monks, it's interesting, but... Dexter Fong: so the sound board kept getting larger Bunnyboy: Dave: Sorry, couldn't resist. Respect, and all that, but I think Morrison is a better performer than composer. klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: Dave, I listened to some stuff by DJ Gregory on KCRW last night that was interesting, not the usual DJ-type compilation. Not techno, not trance, not sampled Bunnyboy: klok: Yeah, but the "sharps" will knock you flat! Dexter Fong: Dav: I answered your msge in case it's not functioning properly Bunnyboy: There's a wonderful soft synth (software applet that behaves like a synthesizer] called the Delay Lama. It's a vocoder/throat singer/emulator. klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: LOL Bunnyboy: Dave: Any luck on the MIDI front?
Dexter Fong goes external mission for drinkies klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: OK, at this point, I gotta drop off and prepare for morrow Bunnyboy: (sings) Turn on your LOVE LIGHT! (Repeats 187 times). Bunnyboy: nite klok. Thanks fer stickin' klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg: bye-bye everyone Dave: bun yes, just need to get screen reader's authorization disc and we're good to go, well, aside from the fact that I've gotta figure out how to use the talking Cakewalk software, I've used it in the demo version of jaws (jaws is the screen reader) and it's worked ok, but I have a problem ||||||||| Around 11:43 PM, klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg walks off into the sunset... Bunnyboy: Ah, me baby's got a plate full of Asparagus Pasta waitin' fer me. Bunnyboy: Dave: My suggestion: Skip the video, just go with the Help file. Bunnyboy: And I'm a hungry goon. Best, all around. ||||||||| 11:45 PM -- Bunnyboy left for parts unknown.(Entry from Nick Danger's "Idiots I Have Been Paid To Follow"). Dexter Fong: Night Bun Merlyn LeRoy: looks like things are breaking up Merlyn LeRoy: hey dave, does your reader keep up OK when it gets busy? Dexter Fong: Dave: There is kinda such music you asked about Dexter Fong: Dave: Second Quintet much more abstract, difficult, harder to grasp at first listening than the first Quintt recording. Dave: yes it does but in case you hadn't nitced my responses to questions usually are long past the original statement just because I type a lot and a lot of people are typing at once, I've learnt to be more specific with the things I answer though Dexter Fong: But then, 6 or so years had passed and Miles had absorbed a lot of what was happening in the changing music scene Dave: thanks dex Merlyn LeRoy: OK, just wondering; I can't really control how much text people produce. Dave: I agree but what a bunch of good musicians there, just shows you what they can do Dexter Fong: But as for your first question: There's a band led by a guy known as Sun Ra Dexter Fong: Sun was actually the brother of the pianist for the Fletcher Henderson orchestra, a black band that Benny Goodman copped a lotta shit from Dexter Fong: Sun featured himself as being from outer space or like that, and did a lotta strange, but interesting stuff, and he had some truly great musicians in his orchestra Dave: fascinating Dexter Fong: Merl: Dunno whether you noticed or not, but I didn't get bounced tonight like I usually do, three or four times (knock on wood) Merlyn LeRoy: hey, here's a neat picture showing the blackout: http://www.dreamwater.org/agc/FUNNIES/OUTAGE.html Merlyn LeRoy: but it might be fake Merlyn LeRoy: it looks "too black" in the black area Dexter Fong: Dave: I found it interesting that you seemed to like the first Quintet so much, which I do too; but you\'ve come into jazz at a much later date than me Merlyn LeRoy: here's a real one: http://www.noaanews.noaa.gov/nightlights/blackout081503-7hrsafter-text.jpg Dexter Fong: Second Quintet requires some serious listening Merlyn LeRoy: Here's the before picture to compare http://www.noaanews.noaa.gov/nightlights/blackout081403-20hrsbefore-text.jpg Dave: yeah dex well, I only actually started exploring it around April, I have an English teacher who's really in to it, he gave me my copy of Kind of Blue and I proceeded to steal all the Miles I could from the library Dexter Fong: Merl: Thanks for the Pics Dave: the thing is that I can't analyze jazz like I can a fiddle tune, my ear just can pick up on the notes, even the piano is hard, and I played piano for 6 years, not jazz though, classical stuff Dexter Fong: Merl: Well I had to brag and of course promptly got ignored Dexter Fong: Dave: That's why I recommend you spend some time listening to earlier stuff, ear training so to speak. ||||||||| Catherwood walks in wearing his pyjamas, yawns, and mumbles "It's midnight here in New York city"...then he falls over and starts snoring loudly.. Dexter Fong: Catherwood's on speed again I see Merlyn LeRoy: I don't follow you, dex. brag? Dexter Fong: Bragged about not getting that thingie where you Dave: it's hard though because of transposition betwene instruments and what my ear is used to hearing, oh and I got Louie's Hot 5 and 7 recordings, fun stuff, haven't listened to all of it though yet Dexter Fong: you're ?server? doesn't recognize me Merlyn LeRoy: oh; I don't think I use the IP address any more, now just the name Merlyn LeRoy: so changing IP addresses shouldn't bother it now Merlyn LeRoy: you on AOL? Dexter Fong: Dave: It doesn't matter what the instrument is, if they're all playing the same song, the chord changes, the basic harmony is the same...realizing of course, that modern, amnd hypermodern palyers use some really strange chord substitutions Dexter Fong: Merl: No, Still on Erols.com Dave: uh now you've lost me dex Dave: ooooh, possibly another theory lesson that I might understand? Dave: sorry now you've got me intersted in the theory behind the whole thing Dexter Fong: Dave: A song, most songs have an underlying harmonic structure..i>e> the chord changes... Dexter Fong: Take a "standard" like for instance "My Funny Valentine" Dave: yes but a poly...whatever it was you mentioned Bubbas A Bum: Hallelujah, I'm a bum. Hallelujah, bum again.....
Bubbas A Bum can't remember the tune. Merlyn LeRoy: a harry langdon reference!?¡ Dexter Fong: If you know the chord changes to "Valentine" what difference would it make what instrument is playing. Any instrument...all instruments are bound by the same harmonic structure...jazz being what it is, of course Dave: oh I see now, true your right Merlyn LeRoy: Harry Langdon made a movie of the same name, I think from the song title Dexter Fong: Now understand that playing "Valentine" doesn't neccesarily "Lock" you into one specific set of chord changes.... Dexter Fong: and that's where the freedom of playing Jazz comes in Dave: the problem is hearing those chord changes, my ear just can't pick them up Dexter Fong: Dave: You have to sit down at an instrument and play them in thir simplest form...experiment with substitutions, and keep your ears open (smile) Dexter Fong: their simplest Dexter Fong: Dave: Can you pick up whatever instrument you choose to play and play a Blues? Bubbas A Bum: Blues Autoharp? Bubbas A Bum: Blues Kazoo? Bubbas A Bum: Blues Banjo? Dexter Fong: Blues Autoharp..the motoring sensation from the delta...Drive one today Dave: yes, well in A or E, but I'm not very good at transposing the usual blues scale, it's just that A and E are easy to work with on a violin, my primary instrument Dexter Fong: Dave: But you understand that the Blues has a basic form...usually twelve bars, and a One-four-five progression, in its most basic form Bubbas A Bum: Blues Dulcimer..... Dexter Fong: Bub: You're here rather late which Im' happy for..but you maybe didn't sign up for Jazz 101? Bubbas A Bum: Blues Harp.... and I really mean HARP Dexter Fong: Blues HARP! The blue beer from Ireland Dexter Fong: Drink all you want, you won't get happy Merlyn LeRoy: bleu harp for cheesy music Bubbas A Bum: Oh, I know blues can be played on anything.... but some instruments just sound so happy...... Dave: I know about the 12 bar pattern, but didn't know about the 145 progression, so in A would that be A, C, then E? or am I totally missing the point Bubbas A Bum: I blew HARP once.... Dave: oops, A, D, E Dexter Fong: Dave: A - D - E would be the progression of chord..again in it's most fundamental form Dexter Fong: Bub: A Harpy blew me once and turned me into a banshee Bubbas A Bum: Made ya scream, eh? Dexter Fong: Alas no, Bub: It was back in the silent movie days, and nobody heard me Dave: hmmm... could you put an aug chord on it somehow? how could you change that to sound different? Merlyn LeRoy: Oh, here's orson welles famous peas rant: http://www.celebrityrants.com/content/celeb_welles2.html Dexter Fong: Except Errol Flynn Senior Merlyn LeRoy: it's hysterical. You need flash, but it's really all audio with a funny animated orson Dexter Fong: Dave: Okay, here's how it goes: 12 bars- most fundemental form - Bubbas A Bum: Oh, good, they have Casey Kasem..... Merlyn LeRoy: yep, that too, ol' dead dog. flash not as funny, though... Dexter Fong: One chord for two bars Dexter Fong: Five chord for two bars Dexter Fong: One chord for two bars Bubbas A Bum: I'm 12 bars past the blues..... Dexter Fong: One chord for two more bar Dexter Fong: Five chord for two bars Dexter Fong: One chord for two more bars Bubbas A Bum: One drink in the first bar. Bubbas A Bum: Five drinks in the second bar... Dexter Fong: Bub: I think I've visted too many bars already =) Bubbas A Bum: One more drink in the third bar.... Dexter Fong: lol Bubbas A Bum: Four Drinks in th enext bar Dexter Fong: I gotta take a whiz aready Bubbas A Bum: And by then I lost track of what bar I was in so I started all over again.... Dexter Fong: Dave: Sorry, I just fucked that up completely Dexter Fong: Second chorus, same as the first Bubbas A Bum: I think I just wrote a song. ||||||||| Around 12:27 AM, Dave walks off into the sunset... Dexter Fong: US Plus, we own the idea of Music Bubbas A Bum: Quick, someone get me a copyright lawyer! Dexter Fong: I gotta Wheelright Dexter Fong: Let's hold up a 7-11 Bubbas A Bum: I want to own everything that does not exist. ||||||||| With a theatrical clearing of his throat, Catherwood pipes up: "12:28 AM and late as usual, it's Dave, just back from Billville." Dexter Fong: Bub: Then you have to support my unborn children Dave: oy Dexter Fong: Dave: OI Bubbas A Bum: That way, whenever someone invents something, I own the rights to it. Dexter Fong: Bubbas Brain: We own the idea of the future Bubbas A Bum: Geez, you're right. I hadn't thought about the child support. Bubbas A Bum: How bout owning everything that could'a been. Dexter Fong: Bub: Sorry but I'm suing you for the big terrorist attack of ought six Dexter Fong: Nothing to say huh? Bubbas A Bum: Hmmm, gotta figure my way out of that one. Dexter Fong: Bub: Please give everything you have to me.....Hello Boys.....Hello Boys Dave: haha dex Bubbas A Bum: Spreaking of witch... its three years into the decade, and nobody has figured out exaclty what to call it yet. Dave: kind of like, "good evening gentlemen, I see you have my lute, ah, excelent" Dexter Fong: I'm calling it Sharifa Merlyn LeRoy: people don't say "aught" for 0 anymore Bubbas A Bum: The oughts? Bubbas A Bum: The Naughts? Bubbas A Bum: The Naughties? Merlyn LeRoy: the ZEEEEros Dexter Fong: Merl: You aughtent to say that Merlyn LeRoy: the goose egg Dexter Fong: The awesomes Bubbas A Bum: But ye doesn't have to call it Johnson. Dexter Fong: Like it's a total decade man Merlyn LeRoy: the al franken fair & balanced decade Dave: the third year of the decade Dexter Fong: lol Merl Dave: or how about, I know, and this is revolutionary, how about calling it the First decade of the 21st century Dexter Fong: ...and Fox is suing you Dexter Fong: Dave: Too long Dexter Fong: Not catchy Bubbas A Bum: Speaking of Al Franken.... my newly former workplace (I told you I was a bum) is duplicaing the book on tape for that. Dave: fine, just denounce my idea dex, LAWSUIT! Dexter Fong: How about the twenties.....no, not those twenties Merlyn LeRoy: hey, franken can claim "balanced" means the stereo is correct Dexter Fong: Merl: More Barn!!! Merlyn LeRoy: anywho, it's late, I'm going to go... Dexter Fong: May the internet always rise behind thee Merl Merlyn LeRoy: um, ok ||||||||| Merlyn LeRoy runs out the back door as Mayor P'nisnose blasts through the front door holding a shotgun and shouting "Where's Merlyn LeRoy?! It's 12:38 AM and my ballot boxes haven't been stuffed yet!" Bubbas A Bum: May the bits be always at they back. Dexter Fong: And may ye be in heaven an hour before AOL knows your dean Dexter Fong: or dead Bubbas A Bum: Is there SPAM in heaven? Dexter Fong: I'm outta here two, night Bub, do I understand you're between engagements at the moment? Dave: yes, when they can still send you spam without realizing you won't read it Dave: later dex, thanks a lot for the jazz stuff Dexter Fong: Dave: How delightfully cynical =)))))))))))))) Dave: very informative, I greatly appreciate it Dexter Fong: Dave: YOu spam comment Dexter Fong: You're Bubbas A Bum: Well night all... gotta go to bed, but I forget why. Dexter Fong: Bub: Night and best wishes =) Bubbas A Bum: Tanks, Dex. ||||||||| 12:41 AM -- Bubbas A Bum left for parts unknown.(Entry from Nick Danger's "Idiots I Have Been Paid To Follow"). Dexter Fong: Dave: You can always email me with comments, questions etc about jazz Dexter Fong: You got my email? Dave: really? cool? smiles Dave: no, I don't Dexter Fong: Okay here it is: Myrnash@erols.com Dexter Fong: Dave: It's up and it's all red and ready to be clicked on (Smiles) Dave: ok, thanks a lot Dave:dcbahr@hotmail.com is mine Dexter Fong: 'course all red isn't really helpful now that I think about it Dave: well no Dexter Fong: Thanks Dave: I'm sure we'll talk about music from time to timer Dexter Fong: time Dexter Fong: Dave: Checking outta here, talk to you soon I hope Dave: late' Dexter Fong: Yes it is Dave, it's very late..Night ||||||||| "12:47 AM? I'm late!" exclaims Dave, who then runs out through the french doors and down through the garden. ||||||||| It's 1:00 AM, and that means it's time to play BEAT THE REAPER! And here's how our contestants did: ||||||||| Dexter Fong - dead from dengue fever ||||||||| Better luck next time! And now, back to our chatroom, which is already in progress... ||||||||| Catherwood enters, and announces to all and sundry "It's 4:32 AM, time to change the log file and clean out unused rooms; please exit the chat room for a minute or two. Thank you for your patience."
The Evening's Participants: ah,clem
Bazooka Jesus Yamamoto
Bubbas A Bum
Bunnyboy
Dave
Dead Fred
Dexter Fong
Dr. Headphones
Elayne
Ham and Eggs Yamamoto
klokwkhot-and-bothered-dawg
llanwydd
Merlyn LeRoy
Mr. Motion
Mudhead
Saskacat
